Akma shook his head. "I don't remember."
"It was family day. We were all there. But you were just little. I
remember you, though, because you weren't shy or scared or anything. Bold
as you please. The king commented on it. 'This one's going to be a great man,
if he's already so brave.' My father remembered. That's why he sent me to look
for you."
Akma felt a thrill of pleasure flutter inside his chest. Pabulog had sent
his son to seek him out, because he had been brave as a baby. He
remembered attacking the soldier who was threatening his mother. Until this
moment, he had never thought of himself as brave, but now he saw that it was
true.
"Anyway, Nuak was at the point of being murdered by Teonig. They say
that Teonig kept demanding that Nuak fight him. But Nuak kept answering,
'I'm the king! I don't have to fight you!' And Teonig kept shouting, 'Don't make
me shame you by killing you like a dog.' Nuak fled up to the top of the tower
and Teonig was on the point of killing him when the king looked out to the
border of the Elemaki country and saw the hugest army of diggers you ever
saw, flooding like a storm onto the land. So Teonig let him live, so the king
could lead the defense. But instead of a defense, Nuak ordered his army to run
so they wouldn't be destroyed. It was cowardly and shameful, and men like
Teonig didn't obey him."
"But your father did," said Akma.
"My father had to follow the king. It's what the priests do," said Didul.
"The king commanded the soldiers to leave their wives and children behind,
but Father wouldn't do it, or at least anyway he took me. Carried me on his
back and kept up with the others, even though I wasn't all that little and he
isn't all that young. So that's why I was there when the soldiers realized that
their wives and children were probably being slaughtered back in the city. So
they stripped old Nuak and staked him down and held burning sticks against
his skin so he screamed and screamed." Didul smiled. "You wouldn't believe
how he screamed, the old sausage."
It sounded awful even to imagine it. It was frightening that Didul, who
could remember having actually seen it, could be so complacent about it.
"Of course, along about then Father realized that the talk was turning to
who else they ought to burn, and the priests would be an obvious target, so
father said a few quiet words in the priest-language and he led us to safety."
"Why didn't you go back to the city? Was it destroyed?"
"No, but Father says the people there weren't worthy to have true priests
who knew the secret language and the calendar and everything. You know.
Reading and writing."
Akma was puzzled. "Doesn't everybody learn how to read and write?"
Didul suddenly looked angry. "That's the most terrible thing your father
did. Teaching everybody to read and write. All the people who believed his lies
and sneaked out of the city to join him, even if they were just peasants which
they mostly were, even if they were turkeyherds. Everybody. He took solemn
vows, you know. When he was made a priest. Your father took those vows,
never to reveal the secrets of the priesthood to anybody. And then he taught
everybody."
"Father says all the people should be priests."
"People? Is that what he says?" Didul laughed. "Not just people, Akma.
It isn't just people that he was going to teach to read."
Akma imagined his father trying to teach the taskmaster to read. He
tried to picture one of the diggers bowed over a book, trying to hold a stylus
and make the marks in the wax of the tablets. It made him shudder.
"Hungry?" asked Didul.
Akma nodded.
"Come eat with me and my brothers." Didul led him into the shade of a
copse behind the hill of the commons.
Akma knew the place -- until the diggers came and enslaved them, it
was the place where Mother used to gather the children to teach them and play
quiet games with them while Father taught the adults at the hill. It gave him a
strange feeling to see a large basket of fruit and cakes and a cask of wine there,
with diggers serving the food to three humans. Diggers didn't belong in that
place where his mother had led the children in play.
But the humans did. Or rather, they would belong wherever they were.
One was little, barely as old as Akma. The other two were both older and larger
than Didul -- men, really, not boys. One of the older ones looked much like
Didul, only not as beautiful. The eyes were perhaps too close together, the
chin just a bit too pronounced. Didul's image, but distorted, inferior,
unfinished.
The other man-sized boy was as unlike Didul as could be imagined.
Where Didul was graceful, this boy was strong; where Didul's face looked open
and light, this one looked brooding and private and dark. His body was so
powerful-looking that Akma marveled that he could pick up any of the fruit
without crushing it.
Didul obviously saw which of his brothers it was that had drawn Akma's
attention. "Oh, yes. Everybody looks at him like that. Pabul, my brother. He
leads armies of diggers. He's killed with his bare hands."
Hearing his words, Pabul looked up and glowered at Didul.
"Pabul doesn't like it when I tell about that. But I saw him once take a
fullgrown digger soldier and break his neck, just like a rotten dry branch.
Snap. The beast peed all over everything."
Pabul shook his head and went back to eating.
"Have some food," said Didul. "Sit down, join us. Brothers, this is
Akma, the son of the traitor."
The older brother who looked like Didul spat.
"Don't be rude, Udad," said Didul. "Tell him not to be rude, Pabul."
"Tell him yourself," said Pabul quietly. But Udad reacted as if Pabul had
threatened to kill him -- he immediately fell silent and began concentrating on
his eating.
The younger brother gazed steadily at Akma, as if evaluating him. "I
could beat you up," he said finally.
"Shut up and eat, Monkey," said Didul. "This is the youngest, Muwu,
and we're not sure he's human."
"Shut up, Didul," said the little one, suddenly furious, as if he knew what
was coming.
"We think Father got drunk and mated with a she-digger to spawn him.
See his little rat-nose?"
Muwu screamed in fury and launched himself at Didul, who easily
fended him off. "Stop it, Muwu, you'll get mud in the food! Stop it!"
"Stop it," said Pabul quietly, and Muwu immediately left off his assault
on Didul.
"Eat," said Didul. "You must be hungry."
Akma was hungry, and the food looked good. He was seating himself
when Didul said, "Our enemies go hungry, but our friends eat."
That reminded Akma that his mother and father were also hungry, as
was his sister Luet. "Let me take some back to my sister and my parents," he
said. "Or let them all come and eat with us."
Udad hooted. "Stupid," murmured Pabul.
"You're the one I invited," said Didul quietly. "Don't embarrass me by
trying to trick me into feeding my father's enemies."
Only then did Akma understand what was happening here. Didul might
be beautiful and fascinating, full of stories and friendliness and wit -- but he
didn't actually care about Akma. He was only trying to get Akma to betray his
family. That was why he kept saying those things about Father, about how he
was a traitor and all. So that Akma would turn against his own family.
That would be like ... like becoming a friend to a digger. It was
unnatural and wrong and Akma understood now that Didul was like the
jaguar, cunning and cruel. He was sleek and beautiful, but if you let him come
near enough, he would leap and kill.
"I'm not hungry," said Akma.
"He's lying," said Muwu.
"No I'm not," said Akma.
Pabul turned to face him for the first time. "Don't contradict my
brother," he said. His voice sounded dead, but the menace was clear.
"I was just saying that I wasn't lying," said Akma.
"But you are lying," said Didul cheerfully. "You're starving to death.
Your ribs are sticking out of your chest so sharp you could cut yourself on
them." He laughed in delight and held out a maizecake. "Aren't you my friend,
Akma?"
"No," said Akma. "You're not my friend, either. You only came to me
because your father sent you."
Udad laughed at his brother. "Well aren't you the clever one, Didul. You
could make friends with him, said you. You could win him over the first day.
Well, he saw right through you."
Didul glared at him. "He might not have till you spoke up."
Akma stood up, furious now. "You mean this was a game?"
"Sit down," said Pabul.
"No," said Akma.
Muwu giggled. "Break his leg, Pabul, like you did that other one."
Pabul looked at Akma as if considering it.
Akma wanted to plead with him, to say, Please don't hurt me. But he
knew instinctively that the one thing he couldn't do with someone like this was
to act weak. Hadn't he seen his father stand before Pabulog himself and face
him down, never showing a moment's fear? "Break my leg if you want," said
Akma. "I can't stop you, because I'm half your size. But if you were in my
place, Pabul, would you sit down and eat with your father's enemy?"
Pabul cocked his head, then beckoned with a lazy hand. "Come here," he
said.
Akma felt the threat receding as Pabul calmly awaited his approach. But
the moment Akma came within reach, Pabul's once-lazy hand snaked out and
took him by the throat and dragged him down to the ground, choking.
Struggling for breath, Akma found himself staring into the hooded eyes of his
enemy. "Why don't I kill you now, and toss your body at your father's feet?"
said Pabul mildly. "Or maybe just toss little bits of your body. Just one little
bit each day. A toe here, a finger there, a nose, an ear, and then chunks of leg
and arm. He could build you back together and when he got all the parts,
everybody'd be happy again, right?"
Akma was almost sick with fear, believing Pabul perfectly capable of such
a monstrous act. Thinking of the grief that his parents would feel when they
saw his bloody body parts took his mind off the great hand that still gripped
his throat, loosely enough now that he could breathe.
Udad laughed. "Akmaro's supposed to be so thick with the Keeper of
Earth, maybe he can get the old invisible dreamsender to work a miracle and
turn all those bodyparts back into a real boy. Other gods do miracles all the
time, why not the Keeper?"
Pabul didn't even look up when Udad spoke. It was as if his brother
didn't exist.
"Aren't you going to plead for your life?" asked Pabul softly. "Or at least
for your toes?"
"Get him to plead for his little waterspout," suggested Muwu.
Akma didn't answer. He kept thinking of how his parents would grieve
-- how they must even now be filled with terror for him, wondering where this
boy had led him. Mother had tried to warn him, sending Luet. But Didul had
been so beautiful, and then so friendly and charming and ... and now the price
of it was this hand at his throat. Well, Akma would bear it in silence as long as
he could. Even the king finally screamed when they tortured him, but Akma
would last as long as he could.
"I think you need to accept my brother's invitation now," said Pabul.
"Eat."
"Not with you," whispered Akma.
"He's a stupid one," said Pabul. "We'll have to help him. Bring me food,
boys. Lots of food. He's very, very hungry."
In moments, Pabul had forced open his mouth and the others were
jamming food into it, far faster than Akma could chew it or swallow it. When
they saw that he was breathing through his nose, they began to jam crumbs
into his nostrils, so that he had to gasp for breath and then choked on the
crumbs that got down his windpipe. Abul let go of his throat and jaw at last,
but only because, coughing, Akma was now so helpless that they could do
whatever they wanted to him, which involved tearing open his clothing and
smearing fruit and crumbs all over his body.
Finally the ordeal was over. Abul delegated Didul, and Didul in turn
assigned his older brother Udad to take the ungrateful, traitorous, and ill-mannered Akma back to his work. Udad seized Akma's wrists and yanked so
harshly that Akma couldn't walk, but ended up being dragged stumbling over
the grassy ground to the top of the hill. Udad then threw him down the hill,
and Akma tumbled head over heels as Udad's laughter echoed behind him.
The taskmaster refused to let any of the humans stop their work to help
him. Shamed and hurt and humiliated and furious, Akma rose to his feet and
tried to clean off the worst of the food mess, at least from his nostrils and
around his eyes.
"Get to work," demanded the taskmaster.
Udad shouted from the top of the hill. "Next time maybe we'll bring your
sister along for a meal!"
The threat made Akma's skin crawl, but he showed no sign of having
heard. That was the only resistance left to him, stubborn silence, just like the
adults.
Akma took his place and worked the rest of the daylight hours. It wasn't
until the sky was darkening and the taskmaster finally let them go that he was
finally able to go to his mother and father tell them what happened.
They spoke in the darkness, their voices mere whispers, for the diggers
patrolled the village at night, listening to hear any kind of meeting or plot -- or
even prayer to the Keeper of Earth, for Pabulog had declared that it was
treason, punishable by death, since any prayer by a follower of the renegade
priest Akmaro was an affront to all the gods. So as Mother scrubbed the dried-on fruit from his body, weeping softly, Akma told Father all that was said and
all that was done.
"So that's how Nuak died," said Father. "He was once a good king. But
he was never a good man. And when I served him, I wasn't a good man either."
"You were never really one of them," said Mother.
Akma wanted to ask his father if everything else Pabulog's sons said was
true, too, but he dared not, for he wouldn't know what to do with the answer.
If they were right, then his father was an oathbreaker and so how could Akma
trust anything he said?
"You can't leave Akma like this," said Mother softly. "Don't you know
how far they've torn him from you?"
"I think Akma is old enough to know you can't believe a liar."
"But they told him you were a liar, Kmaro," she said. "So how can he
believe you?"
It amazed Akma how his mother could see things in his mind that even
he himself had barely grasped. Yet he also knew it was shameful to doubt your
own father, and he shuddered at the look on his father's face.
"So they did steal your heart from me, is that it, Kmadis?" He called him
dis, which meant beloved child; not ha, which meant honored heir, the name
he used when he was especially proud of Akma. Kmaha -- that was the name
he wanted to hear from his father's lips, and it remained unspoken. Ha-Akma.
Honor, not pity.
"He stood against them," Mother reminded him. "And suffered for it, and
he was brave."
"But they sowed the seed of doubt in your heart, didn't they, Kmadis?"
Akma couldn't help it. It was too much for him. He cried at last.
"Set his mind at rest, Kmaro," said Mother.
"And how will I do that, Chebeya?" asked Father. "I never broke my oath
to the king, but when they drove me out and tried to have me killed, then yes, I
realized that Abindiro was right, the only reason to keep the common people
from learning to read and write and speak the ancient language was to
preserve the priests' monopoly on power. If everyone could read the calendar,
if everyone could read the ancient records and the laws for themselves, then
why would they need to submit to the power of the priests? So I broke the
covenant and taught reading and writing to everyone who came to me. I
revealed the calendar to them. But it isn't evil to break an evil covenant."
Father turned to Mother. "He isn't understanding this, Chebeya."
"Sh," she said.
They fell silent, only the sound of their breathing filling their hut. They
could hear the pattering feet of a digger running through the village.
"What do you suppose his errand is?" Mother whispered.
Father pressed a finger to her lips. "Sleep," he said softly. "All of us,
sleep now."
Mother lay down on the mat beside Luet, who had long since dropped off
to sleep. Father lay down beside Mother and Akma settled in on the other side
of him. But he didn't want Father's arm cast over him. He wanted to sleep
alone, to absorb his shame. The worst of his humiliations wasn't the gagging
and choking, it wasn't the smearing with fruit, it wasn't tumbling down the hill,
it wasn't facing all the people in tattered clothing, covered with filth. The worst
humiliation was that his father was an oathbreaker, and that he had had to
learn it from Pabulog's sons.
Everyone knew that an oathbreaker was the worst kind of person. He
would say one thing, but no one could count on him to do it. So you could do
nothing with him. You could never trust him when you weren't there to watch.
Hadn't Mother and Father taught him from earliest infancy that when he said
he would do a thing, he had to do it, or he had no honor and could not be
trusted?
Akma tried to think about what Father said, that to break and evil
covenant was good. But if it was an evil oath, why would you swear to it in the
first place? Akma didn't understand. Was Father evil once, when he took the
evil oath, and then he stopped being evil? How did someone stop being evil
once he started? And who decided what evil was, anyway?
That soldier Didul told him about -- Teonig? -- he had the right idea.
You kill your enemy. You don't sneak around behind his back, breaking
promises. None of the children would ever tolerate a sneak. If you had a
quarrel, you stood up and yelled at each other, or wrestled in order to bend the
other to your will. You could argue with a friend that way, and still be a friend.
But to go behind his back, then you weren't a friend at all. You were a traitor.
No wonder Pabulog was angry at Father. That's what brought all this
suffering down on us. Father was a sneak, hiding in the wilderness and
breaking promises.
Akma started to cry. These were terrible thoughts, and he hated them.
Father was good and kind, and all the people loved him. How could he be an
evil sneak? Everything the sons of Pabulog said had to be lies, had to be. They
were the evil ones, they were the ones who had tormented him and humiliated
him. They were the liars.
Except that Father admitted that what they said was true. How could
bad people tell the truth, and good people break oaths? The thought still spun
crazily in Akma's head when he finally drifted off to sleep.
Copyright © 1995 Orson Scott Card
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