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I’ve never been one for doing things in their proper chronology. I learned to walk before I learned to crawl. I did eventually learn to crawl, since it was necessary for various games and such, but I completely skipped over it as a method of locomotion, going straight from scooting around in a seated position to walking. I took classes at the local community college while I was in high school and received my Associates Degree the same week as I received my high school diploma. I entered university as a junior, but dropped out after a year and a half. Six years later I was accepted into a Master’s Degree program, although I still lacked a few credits necessary for my Bachelor’s Degree. I was supposed to finish them up during the summer, but I procrastinated and actually finished the four-year Master’s program before I received my Bachelor’s. When I mentioned to a friend that I was considering going back to school for a PhD he said, “are you sure you don’t want to do a post-doc first?”
I mention all of this only to illustrate that there’s nothing all that surprising (to me) about the fact that Bob and I were engaged before our first date. It fits right in with the pattern of my life. In fact, one of my friends, when I told her about the engagement, said, “this is perfectly insane, but it’s also perfectly in character. With anyone else I’d worry that they’d been brainwashed or something, but this is just so totally you.” So for those of you who’ve asked (and those of you who didn’t) – here’s the real timeline of what was going on behind the threads Bob and I posted about our relationship.
Relationship Timeline (Highlights)
Background: Bob and dkw had met twice in person, and spent an entire day together at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival last September. He also had dinner at her parents house that Friday and met both her siblings. And they’d been maintaining a fairly regular e-mail correspondence since December 2003.
February 17, 2004 – Bob sends dkw a letter, asking her if she would like to go on a date.
February 21, 2004 – Bob calls in to the Midwest Hatrack Gathering at dkw’s house. She hasn’t been to the post office since Wednesday, and thus hasn’t seen the letter. The phone is passed around and a good time is had by all.
February 22, 2004 – dkw still hasn’t been to the post office, but sends Bob an e-mail thanking him for calling and asking if she can call him later. He responds enthusiastically, but she falls asleep at 8:30pm, before receiving his reply.
February 23, 2004 – dkw still hasn’t been to the post office, but calls Bob to chat. After some conversation, he asks if she has received the postage check he sent for the books she loaned him. She says no. After more conversation, he tells her that in the letter accompanying the check, he asked if she would like to go on a date. She admits that she would like that very much.
February 25, 2004 – Bob arranges to extend an upcoming business trip to Chicago and drive over to Iowa on March 25 for a first date.
February 29, 2004 AM – Bob has breakfast with Icarus and Cor and tells them he and dkw are dating.
February 29, 2004, even later – on a long phone conversation, dkw and Bob admit that they are both thinking of this as more than a one-time date, and talk about what they want for the future and both confess, in a round-about way, that they’ve fallen in love with each other. Without ever actually saying it directly.
March 1, 2004, 6:00am – Bob sends dkw an e-mail reassuring her that he meant everything he said on the phone, and stating, directly, that he loves her, and that he hopes he isn’t going too fast and scaring her off.
March 1, 2004, 10:15am – dkw sends Bob an e-mail going even further, and hopes she isn’t going too fast and scaring him off.
March 1, 2004, 5:04pm – Bob sends dkw an e-mail beginning with the lines, “Okay, I'm not coming up there for a date anymore. I'm coming up to figure out how short an engagement we can have and still maintain your reputation in the community.”
March 1, 2004 – Farmgirl sends Bob an e-mail asking if he is who dkw is posting about.
March 2, 2004, AM -- dkw tells her parents she’s going to marry Bob.
March 2, 2004, PM – Tom D and Dan Raven figure out that Bob and dkw are posting about each other.
March 3, 2004 – katharina mis-reads a post and briefly thinks Bob and dkw are engaged. Much hilarity results from this at the Bob and dkw residences.
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YAYYYYYY!!! Best timeline ever!! It makes much more sense now. (laughs) Two days between when you decided to bridesmaid me and when I asked! SO AWESOME. (uses psychic powers to get the evening off of work)
I'm glad that you and Bob get to be happy, Dana. Your timeline makes it all make just a tidge more sense. Also I remember you guys talking about the ren fest, but I didn't realize quite that it was the MN one. You should come next year!! Hehehe. I love that fest.
Posts: 4816 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Ryuko, we might not make it this year, but we’re definitely going to try. It’s become a special place to us, even though we didn’t know it at the time. That and garlic-almond-fudge-chip ice cream at Sebastian Joe’s.
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I can see you two doing the happilly ever after thing.
The only thing that could have made the timeline better would be pirates. There just aren't enough pirates in it.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I must say, the upcoming events are really cool. Especially the "Ever After" thing. And with two people like you and Bob, I'm sure it's also veeeery doable !
Posts: 4519 | Registered: Sep 2003
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You two are so cute. I just bet there are any number of jaded hardnoses out there vomiting as we speak. Congrats on 4000, and, of course, right on.
Posts: 4534 | Registered: Jan 2003
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I hope you don't mind me saying that I've always thought that both of you are some of the best members of Hatrack. So hearing that you two are going to tie the knot more than doubles my joy.
If you two are half as wonderful in real life as you are here on Hatrack, I'm sure you will have a grand life together.
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Wow, what a way to meet somebody! You guys are both awesome people, and I hope you make each other very happy.
Posts: 4229 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Awwww... Now I'm sad. I meant to go to the drag ball at my school tonight, where I was going to dress as Captain Jack Sparrow. But I forgot I had to work so now I'm miserable at work... Without my pirate shirt.
..I blame Bob for depressing me.
Posts: 4816 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Maybe it's just cause I'm a girl...but I just love hearing the details (with dates and times attached) of a meeting, courtship, and successful falling in love. I sit with my chin in my hand and just smile...that's actually how I just read this post. Thanks dkw for satisfying my girly need for the details and for sharing your happiness with us.
And thank you Bob for being a necessary part of all of that too.
Posts: 6415 | Registered: Jul 2000
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quote:Maybe it's just cause I'm a girl...but I just love hearing the details (with dates and times attached) of a meeting, courtship, and successful falling in love.
Me too. Usually I hide that side of me by inserting the barfing icon, but among you guys, I'll admit I'm a sucker for stories of good people falling in love with each other.
There's only so many ways I can find to express how highly I think of both of you, and how thrilled I am for you as well. And I can't wait until you eventually move to Florida!
A correction:
quote:February 29, 2004 AM – Bob has breakfast with Icarus and Cor and tells them he and dkw are dating.
No. Bob has breakfast with Icarus and Cor and tells them he's dating somebody from Hatrack. Icarus offers to guess who in twenty questions, and gets it in three.
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Ic, could you send me Cor’s e-mail address? I need to poll the females in the wedding party on some costuming issues. (This is turning into such a production, I’m glad we have lots of theatre people involved )
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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Dana, that's so great ! Congatulations for your landmark, and to both of you for the wedding ! I will tell you in one week how it feels to be married Best wishes, all the hapiness you want !
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001
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I have been debating mentioning this, but why not. Its my way of going for "Best Thread Killing" award.
Was there anyone else who had a quick fear when they read:
quote: I’ve never been one for doing things in their proper chronology.
In a thread by an engaged woman, what is the first thing that comes to your mind when they speak on "Not in their proper chronology."
Or was I the only one that thought "baby?"
I knew better. That is not something I would expect from Dana or Bob before the wedding. It just crossed my mind for a moment, and I'm so ashamed.
The more I got to think about it, the more I realize that it does fit into Dana's wacky sense of timing.
I mean in this day and age, a woman who walks before she crawls, graduates high school and college the same fortnight, and gets engaged before her first date must be totally out of whack with expected chronolgy. What is more out of whack in today's world than waiting until after the wedding to consumate it.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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Now Dan, Lavalamp told you, the baby's not due until July 2006. It's a compromise between Bob's much abused "three year plan" and my tendency to muck up timelines as much as I kill timepieces.
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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