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As many of you know, Eve's brother, Casey, was killed in a car accident last Wednesday night, May 11. Many of you gave us your thoughts and prayers, and these were a real comfort to us during this time of sorrow. We've popped up that thread many times since then when we needed a little encouragement or just needed to know someone was thinking of us. Thank you all so much. Now I want to share a little about Casey.
Eve and her mom were going through some of Casey's things and came across a set of maps he made on some Provident Life and Accident¯ stationary sometime during elementary school. The map included Fox Brook, Eagle Brook, Bobcat Rapids, Owl Falls, Eagle River, Rattlesnake Lake, Death Falls, Hunting Woods, Rattlesnake Woods, and Davy Crockett Stream, Fort, Rapids, and Mountain ("Born on a mountaintop in Tennessee"). There were hundreds of little trees (two vertical lines and an inverted 'V'¯), craggy mountains, and meandering water.
The best thing we found, though, was the charter document for The Great Outdoors Club. There was a list of members and a list of bosses (which included all the members). There was a list of "Ones Who Decide Club Rules" and a list of "Ones who Make Maps."¯ There were lists of doctors, detectives, cops, "spys,"¯ and "mathmatians."¯ The list of "Here's what you'll do" included look for arrow heads, polish rifles, look for civil war things, Nintendo, and Sega. The list of weapons ranged from clubs to machine guns to "magnum (gun)"¯ to bazooka.
The very best part, though, was the list of rules:
you got to be nice
be nice to girls
help people
don't say bad words
don't lie
don't do bad things
Casey was a man who kayaked, who ran his own trap line when he was 13, who climbed rocks - a natural athlete and a born leader. But he was also a boy who knew the most important rule of all: "you got to be nice."¯
Sounds like he was a very special -- and nice, in the genuine sense of the word that doesn't get used as often as it should -- guy. I know he will be missed.
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Dag, I missed your sad news. I'm so very sorry. Casey sounds like a lovely person and his loss is a truly terrible thing.
Posts: 3037 | Registered: Jan 2002
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I only just now became aware of your loss. I'm so sorry! Dagonee and Eve, that was beautiful. I'm glad you have these things to remember him by.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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I'm glad Hatrack helped you guys a little. I'm so sorry for your loss. Thankyou for sharing some of Casey's life with us; his rules are awesome.
Posts: 1595 | Registered: Feb 2003
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Remembering a lost loved one's strengths is what holds me together during the grieving process. Casey's outlook on life is an inspiration to us all. Wishing you and Eve and family the very best.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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He sounds like a formidable and caring person. I'm sorry for your loss, but glad you can take comfort in those memories. I remember going through photos when my mother died, and her scrapbooks, just remembering. Posts: 1664 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Those are outstanding rules, Dagonee & Eve. Casey sounds like a very good man. From your description I am convinced that even though it magnifies the loss, your brother-in-law's life bettered the lives of others and had a truly positive impact on them as well, that will be remembered and cherished.
Putting 'You got to be nice' down on paper, I don't know, it rings of an optimistic earnestness that I think we lose track of sometimes. From your description, Casey sort of reminds me of a hero from a book or a movie, someone who doesn't have super-powers or a mythic enemy, but just a good guy who makes things better.
Anyway, I'm rambling. I'm sorry again for your loss, and I'm glad both of you have been able to take any little encouragement from the `Rack.
He sounds like a great guy. This is the ultimate ammunition for mothers who insist on keeping every document their children produce. But it's not an argument anyone should have to win.
I never actually met Casey, but I do have great memories of him. His family and friends loved him very much, and they shared that love with others even as they grieved.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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What a great set of rules to live by. I'm sorry you have lost such a special person, but am glad you (and us, through you) had a chance to know him, if only a little bit.
Posts: 5879 | Registered: Apr 2001
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He was 24 or 23. I heard both ages from non-family and forgot to ask Eve which it was. That makes him about seven years younger than Eve.
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