I found out that when Mack was telling someone about Nathan and they asked about how they met she said "mutual friends".
When I was talking to this lady in the hall at Kama Con with Christy, she described it as a "convention". I never actually thought of it in that regards despite the name. "Conventions" only have the nerdy undertones to those involved in the subculture so it really is a good subtrefuge.
Of course those were the dignified responses. I've never been accused of dignity. How I explained it to my coworkers: "Like Trekkies, but we aren't quite that wierd and we read more."
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Yes -- I had a difficult time explaining KamaCon to family/friend/co-workers. Because it was hard to put into words.
Yes -- we are all friends from a site dedicated to an author we all like. No, we don't just sit around talking about his books or about him. No, he wasn't there, etc. etc. It was really really hard to explain. But I did use the word "convention" because it was just the easiest way to go....
Also used the concept of "road trip" a lot -- the guys could relate to that...
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The only problem with describing it as a convention is the follow-up questions. "Oh, so this is for work? What was the topic?"
"Um, no, it's a bunch of people I know from online."
. . . and my cousins don't even have a computer, let alone web access. (Thank goodness I ended up staying with someone else! AOL is awful, but a heck of a lot better than no access for two days. ) So I got looks . . . and then we moved on to other subjects.
Then again, people who have known me well for years responded to, "For a convention" with, "Oh, is this one of your Star Trek things or a Pern thing?" *chuckle*
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To new friends and people I don't know well: "I have a large group of friends scattered around the country, and we get together once a year or so."
To closer friends and potential Hatrackers: "I have this geeky other life that I secretly love."
To best friends: "I don't have a family. Hatrack takes its place."
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Haha, I've encountered that problem, now that I've been bouncing around the school, telling everyone that "my friend rivka is coming to visit!!!!!!!" But usually, people start asking questions, and then it comes up that rivka and I have actually never met...
I'm not sure how I say it, though. It varies every time. I usually try to go for what I think won't freak people out!
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Bob and I had our first pre-marital counseling session the week before KamaCon. (Since my mentor is officiating, we asked a pastoral counselor who is not a close friend to do the counseling.) When she said, “so tell me how you met,” we looked at each other for a minute and then I said, “Um, do you want to take that one?”
Most of the time when people ask I go with “we’re both members of an online discussion group.” For some reason that sounds better than “we met on the internet.”
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you know as much as I loathe the commercials, I think the E-Harmony type commercials, are gradually de-stigmatizing the "met on the internet" thing to the public perception. As for me, my coworkers already know I'm weird.
My boss basically told me he was glad I took some time off to have fun which was pretty nice of him too! I played up the Kama angle with him though since he is Polish himself.
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I say "online book club" or "writer's group" sometimes, since that is usually what brings us here.
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For simplicity I just say "An online discussion and book group." I tried to call hatrack "An online discussion and book group of people who have met each other or who have met people who have met other people who have met other people...somehow we know the others are real...for the most part," but that confused me more than anyone else. Satyagraha
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I got some odd looks when I told my in laws I had taken my kids with me to meet some people I met on the internet.
I have some advantage in that I've never had to explain it to someone who hadn't heard of Orson Scott Card. P.S. (Though it gives the false assumption that most of you are Mormon)
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"This weekend we helped organize and went to a convention -- Kamacon -- of Hatrackers -- an internet bulletin board for fans of Orson Scott Card -- celebrating Kama's visit to the US from Poland."
Ported straight from my journal and pretty close to how I explain Hatrack -- an internet discussion site for fans of an author we like, Orson Scott Card. Of course, most people then say who? (or the less tech savvy ones say what?) My mom just smiles and nods, but she does now remember Card's name now, which is funny.
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I don't. It's that simple. Anyone who asks or gives me a look when I'm posting and should be doing something else gets no explanation whatsoever. Surely they have some weird habit/addiction that they'd not like to explain to me...
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It was a little difficult trying explain to my friends and family who Ralphie was and why a perfect "stranger" was staying at my place for a week. "She's this really cool friend I met a few years ago, and she's here to party with me and a few others who are flying in. What? Where did I meet these people? At the hatrack. No, it's not a bar...it's a community of people that enjoy talking to each other on this online forum...yeah, the same people from e-nerdcon. Yes, they use the sking from their love handles to graft pointy ears all the time. Stop pointing and laughing at me or I'll have to punch you in the throat."
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I said I was going to visit some friends in Chicago.
Then they say "oh, the ones who are getting married next week?"
Then I say "no, different friends."
It never actually comes up that I've met you people online, though I've been pressed about stuff, mostly by my brother. I don't think I ever really said it wasn't the same friends, so he was under the impression I was going up for a Bachelor party or something and didn't want to admit it I think.
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Yeah, I guess saying "I'm going to Chicago to see a hot chick from Poland with a sexy accent" would have made him think you were going to a bachelor party even more rather than a nerd convention.
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I don't remember really explaining it but somehow all my friends know about it. They think it's weird, but during get-togethers I rarely tell people it's a Hatrack get-together. I usually just say, "I'm meeting some friends of mine up in Phoenix" or something similar. They don't have to know which definition of "meeting" I'm using.
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That's okay -- my mom thinks it's an all-female group (she would preach at me if she thought there were men around -- and remember, I'm 43!). I purposely only mention the females I know will be there -- Dana, Anna, etc. etc. So she thinks it is just a "girl gathering"
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It's funny...I should be concerned that one of you is an ax murderer...but I'm not. Nearly everyone that comes to get togethers has met other people and been determined sane. Plus, this doesn't seem like a good hunting ground for psychos. I think they prefer pretending to be fourteen on teenage chat sites.
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For simplicity's sake I just said I was going to a convention and/or a gathering of internet friends and when pressed for more info by my closer friends and family I gave them the full run down on what Hatrack is.
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Sometimes I just bite the bullet and say I'm meeting people I met online just because everyone at least thinks they know what I'm talking about, even if that means they think I'm nuts. A lot of times I say I'm going to visit my girlfriend, I like that one a lot.
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I can't. People think I'm totally nuts when I tell them about Hatrack, so usually I avoid the subject. They seem to think I'm like these Japanese guys who have no social life outside the Internet and don't actually go out of their home if they are not forced to. *sigh* I think it's even less usual here than in the USA, but I may be wrong. EDIT : spelling and the last sentence
[ August 18, 2004, 03:07 PM: Message edited by: Anna ]
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Different kinds of psychos PSI - pedophiles are a far cry from serial killers.
Well, not such much, in retrospect.
And I've always thought the axe gets a bad rap - I mean c'mon, of all the possible household implements one might use to express displeasure, the axe just lacks imagination and creativity.
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I was including all kinds of psychos in that description...I'm thinking that if a pedophile goes so far as to meet one of the kids, he might as well kill him/her.
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I explained Chicago by "Remember when I went to Georgia in January? It's the same friends. We take turns hosting cities."
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I'm straightforward about it - I tell people I needed a place to get away from work. Not having a lot of time, I found this online community.
I then describe the community as consisting of people who mostly have only one thing in common - we've all read and enjoyed one particular author. We don't spend much time talking about that author or his books, though. We talk about just about everything - including some stuff that is related to my work once in awhile.
It really doesn't seem that weird to people.
Or maybe it just doesn't seem that weird coming from me, all things being relative.
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Actually, I make sure everyone knows it's a website that is pretty much for fans of OSC, because that sounds less creepy than "people I met online".
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sndrake and PSI, sounds very much like what I say. And I don't think it sounds all that weird to people. Though maybe they are secretly thinking: >_>
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I've never had the problem. I have decided, however, that if somebody I know from the rest of my life sees me talking to a Hatracker, and it's the first time I've seen the Hatracker in person, I'll tell my acquaintance "we just met". I haven't thought about if I see any of you TWICE, though.
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I don't try to explain. Vána explains our trips away by saying that we're going to "visit some of Dan's friends." The subject really hasn't come up with my immediate family, them being in Indiana and all.
Vána's family accepts it because they know I'm a bit strange, but keep good friends.