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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Which OSC character would be the best lover? (Page 1)

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Author Topic: Which OSC character would be the best lover?
Beren One Hand
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OK, try to keep this thread on a PG-13 level. Who is your pick? One of the Worthings who can read minds and anticipate their partner's every desire? The organ growers from the Planet Treason? They have extra parts that could come in handy....

I'm sorry for this thread. I've been up for two days straight and these things just pop into my mind. [Embarrassed]

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Mr.Funny
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Graff. Definately Graff. [Wink]
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Ryuko
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LOL... Mr. Funny, you get extra points. For old men. [Big Grin]
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Synesthesia
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Ender. I don't know why Novinha had to get him... And Alvin... and also Peggy because she's just so cool.
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Zotto!
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Ender, obviously, 'cause he's so, y'know, empathetic and all.

*laughs at that "try to keep this PG-13 level" line*

WHY IS RALPHIE NOT ON THIS THREAD?!

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The Silverblue Sun
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THOR
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Ryuko
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I'm thinking Ender as well, personally. I was fallin' in love with him through the pages of the book... (hearts in eyes)
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hansenj
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I agree, Ryuko...especially Speaker for the Dead.

*swoons*

I hate to agree with the majority, but Ender's my kind of man! [Blushing]

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The Silverblue Sun
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I'm still voting...

THOR

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Mr.Funny
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quote:
THOR497: We should outlaw guys from Hatrack.
There you have it! A scandal. He is sexist! [Wink] Don't vote for him!
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ak
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I have to say Ender as well, because of his intensity, and his willingness to move heaven and earth for those he loves. Also his intelligence and creativity and tendency to find novel solutions, for instance in the battle room, I think would carry over into other aspects of his life. Because he is super smart he would learn everything there was to know, and because of his other qualities, he would deploy that knowledge with brilliance, I feel certain. Yes, I am certain Ender would be the one. But because of his loyalty and honor, only Novinha knows for sure.

I don't think Wang Mu really even will know. Ender's-aiua-as-young-Peter doesn't strike me as being the same at all in those respects.

[ August 26, 2003, 05:54 AM: Message edited by: ak ]

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Chaeron
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Peter.
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Noemon
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How about that alien being from Wyrms?
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twinky
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Does it have tentacles?
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Human
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[Eek!] [Angst] [Eek!] [Angst] [Eek!]
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Noemon
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You know it baby!

Actually, I don't really remember. It's been over a decade since I read Wyrms.

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Leonide
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I only read it a few weeks ago and i don't remember if it had *tentacles*, per se. But i think the slimy, gelatinous mass part of him would be an instant turn-off. Don't you?

And come on, have you seen the pictures of Alvin on the book covers? He's like, inhuman! More muscles than are feasible. He's supposed to look like every woman's dream guy. [Roll Eyes] Personally, i'd be afraid that he'd accidentally break the bed or what have you. Would he even know his own strength?

And Ender...man, would it not be the creepiest thing in the world to make love to a guy who was not only constantly in communication with a sentient computer program, but ALSO telepathically and spiritually linked to an entire race of insect-like aliens!? I would not want to hear *anything* that guy called out in the throes of passion, you know what i'm saying?

"This is the place! This is the place!!!"

[Angst]

[ August 26, 2003, 09:35 AM: Message edited by: Leonide ]

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Noemon
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quote:
But i think the slimy, gelatinous mass part of him would be an instant turn-off. Don't you?
Well, Diego Rivera was pretty repulsive looking, but from the stories it doesn't sound like that slowed him down much. I kind of imagine it would be the same way for the Wyrms creature.
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twinky
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Hm. I think the succubus in Treasure Box would make the best lover. I'm not sure Valentine would be experimental enough [Wink]
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Jacare Sorridente
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The succubus is a good call, but I'm going to have to go with with the cute little Russian princess from Enchantment. There is much to be said for a sexy accent.
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Leonide
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Mmmmm....Russians... [Evil]
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twinky
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Not having read Enchantment, I couldn't say...
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Leonide
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Well we can only hope that, *after* reading it, you wouldn't say "Baba Yaga."

Ivan is a good pick, I think. Reminds me of someone i know in real life

[Wink] [Smile] [Blushing] [Kiss]

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zgator
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Keep in mind that the creature in Wyrms could make you think he was the greatest lover ever. Even though Patience saw what he was, she still wanted him more than anything.
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Noemon
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[Laugh] Leo

Safe to say that Baba Yaga didn't leap to mind.

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Leonide
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He could make you *think* he was, yes. But in actuality, he probably wasn't. Plus, what would have happened after the mating? Wouldn't the lust have worn off of her? And then what would she have? Just Mr. Smelly Gelatinous Mass, oozing all over the place. Not the ideal boyfriend.
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Noemon
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Exactly, zgator. Just like Diego Rivera, I think. I'll bet that he was OSC's inspiration for that character.
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zgator
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quote:
Just Mr. Smelly Gelatinous Mass, oozing all over the place. Not the ideal boyfriend.
After a few years of marriage, a lot women end up with exactly that.
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Noemon
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We're not talking about best partner, though, are we? That wasn't how I read the initial question.

As long as we're just talking about fun in the sack, I'm definitely going with the gleatinous mass.

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zgator
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That gelatinous mass could function as a water bed after the fun was over. Or even during the fun.
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Annie
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I've always had a secret crush on Calvin.

And I'll also vote for Suriyawong.

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ClaudiaTherese
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I can honestly say that I've experienced a dearth of thoughts about lovers while reading the works of OSC.

Well, in the short stories, maybe, but more in the abstract. "Feed the Baby of Love" got me pondering pretty heavily on interpersonal relationships. But as for characters as lovers, that topic never seemed to come up for me. So to speak. [Big Grin]
.
.
.
Not that I think y'all are perverts or anything.
[Laugh]
.
.
.
Not that there's anything wrong with that, either.
[Wink]

Just ... gelatinous mass? Oh, Noemon, Noemon. [Monkeys]

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T. Analog Kid
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The woman in Freeway Games...
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Leonide
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No, but i thought we were talking about more than just a once-and-done deal. My point is that i think Gelatinous Mass would only be good for the first go-round. After that, no dice. Unless we're talking about just one night of passion, in which case, I'll go with Gelatinous Mass too. But i won't be happy about it!
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Olivet
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If Patience and the Gelatious mass had made their baby, HE would have been good-- all that telepathic lust-inducingness pluss a pretty package. [Big Grin]

I honestly vote for Queen Beauty, but she'd hafta wanna. [Razz]

Yes, I know I identify waaay too much with that villianess [Eek!]

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twinky
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I think I'm sticking with the succubus.
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zgator
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quote:
Unless we're talking about just one night of passion, in which case, I'll go with Gelatinous Mass too. But i won't be happy about it!
Yeah you will. [Evil Laugh]
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Leonide
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man...waking up next to GM in the morning....::shudders::

I think that takes Coyote Ugly to a whole new level.

[Angst]

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ClaudiaTherese
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Oh, jimminy cricket. I just don't want to know y'all this well. I don't.

*hides
[Eek!]

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Noemon
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[Laugh] CT

Come on, you know you want the GM too. Everybody wants the GM.

If I were going to do this with Octavia Butler's characters, I'd definitely go with a construct ooloi. You've got the best of all possible partners there.

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fil
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Well, I would go with Mistress Modesty, that vixen.

[Big Grin]

fil

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BannaOj
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I bet Alvin could manipulate things biochemcially just as well as the aforementioned gelatinous mass could mentally. (Though I confess I haven't read that book yet, dew to the fact that I'm rationing OSC's unread books out to myself like water to a man dying of thirst.) And, I wouldn't want to wake up next to GM in the morning. So, I'm voting for Alvin.

Changing my vote to Calvin, because he probably wouldn't have the qualms about being willing to do said biochemical manipulations that Alvin would have had, though he might not be as good at it either and you could end up dead.

AJ

[ August 26, 2003, 11:07 AM: Message edited by: BannaOj ]

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ClaudiaTherese
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My mind has been taken over by indecent thoughts of the GM. It's like a mental succubus for me -- I can't let it go.

Thanks, Noemon. Thanks so much. [Grumble] Now I will never be satisfied.

*sigh

And I am at work, too. Dang you. The cafeteria isn't even serving Jello.

[Wink]

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celia60
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Oh, please. This is an easy one. Verily Cooper. What's his knack? You don't think that's good in the sack?

Mmm...hmmm.

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Noemon
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Okay CT, you just made me crack up here in my cube! Co-workers suspect that I might not be working now!

Banna--since Calvin did that a couple of books ago, I'm sure Alvin could too, but he probably wouldn't be willing to.

Celia--it's been too long; what is Verily's knack?

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dkw
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Point of detail . . . Unwyrm was not a gelatinous mass. He had a segmented body with an armored back and multiple appendages on the underside.
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twinky
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>> Now I will never be satisfied. << (CT)

I think I just bit my tongue off.

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celia60
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fitting things together, dear.

and i think you're right about alvin. he'd probably think that was a missuse of his gift. the fool.

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Noemon
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But I'll bet he could make you *think* he was a gelatinous mass, right? And in the meantime you'd have all those appendages to play with.
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twinky
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So there are tentacles!
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