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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Don't let hate happen here. (Page 2)

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Author Topic: Don't let hate happen here.
Shawshank
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pH, I for one have never really thought that about you. I realize I do a lot more reading than posting- but it just seems like sometimes you take things a little too personally. Especially here lately.

Take a breath. Take another one- I've seen a few people make some elitist comments thinking they were sticking up for the anti-elitist cause in various threads (although I can't remember who they were- I just remembered being somewhat shocked by what they were saying)

But don't let their remarks make you lose control and become paranoid.

The place has been a little bit more negative here in general lately. But I think Bob and Kwea are right in saying that certain problems need to be dealt with. Ignoring is not always the answer- sometimes you got to fight back a little bit.

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Kwea
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As long as that isn't ALL you do. [Wink]


Honestly, I still love this place. I think that most people do, and that is why it is worth fighting for, as long as that doesn't become ALL you do here. [Smile]

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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
Link.

I don't know how to link to specific threads...

quote:
This sounds like lese majesty - outrage that someone would dare say something like that to you and you want to make sure they'll regret it
-pH
After going through the thread you linked to, I have to say that I'm not sure if I can take sides here. For the most part, I understand your frustrations with your therapist and I also believe that her behavior was highly unprofessional; however, I couldn't understand why you had to snap at katherina so harshly when it seemed like she was genuinely trying to help you. I don't have OCD, nor do I personally know anybody who has it, so I'm not capable of really knowing how it affects you, but if a therapist treated me the way yours did, all I would do is fire her discreetly, and just never go to her again. In other words, I'd just get over it and move on, she's not the only therapist in the world. And perhaps, she could've been right, maybe you are spoiled, but it was not her place to put it that way. I'm not one to say whether you are indeed spoiled or not, I don't believe I know you that well, but I would at least want to know why someone would've called me that. Perhaps what you need is not a therapist, but something else. Perhaps you need to set order to your life on your own.
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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by Kwea:
I don't want to be an old, curmundgy person always talking about the "golden times".....there really weren't any "golden times", to be honest. We had Ced, and w2w, and OSCfan, just to mention a few.

And newfoundlogic...

[Frown]

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Rappin' Ronnie Reagan
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I think you might want to read that quote from Kwea again, Alt...
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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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nfl didn't exactly leave but in a way, our community is less without him. He always had something good to say.
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quidscribis
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The point that Kwea was making, though, was that we had trolls and boors and bullies back then. newfoundlogic is not one of those. That's what RRR was getting at. [Smile]
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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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Yes, but I was trying to make a point that although there was never really those "golden times" just like she pointed out, our community has changed because of people leaving. In other words, we miss the people that she mentioned in the beginning, and I decided to add NFL's name to that list since I kinda miss him too. Hatrack just isn't the same without him. [Frown]
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Tresopax
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quote:
I don't see how there can be any "togetherness" when everything I say is written off. I also don't see how there can be any "togetherness" when people feel perfectly free to gang up on and pick on me and still think that they don't owe any kind of apology.
I would not say you are alone in that boat on Hatrack. There may be more people in that boat than out of it. At least we are together insofar as we are all written off by one another together... [Wink]
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Samprimary
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This forum has some very strange and amorphous boundaries, which create a strange sort of nega-insult environment. If you skirt the rules well enough and don't go into flagrant abuse of the rules too often, then you just end up getting some threads locked on your account but may well end up being essentially able to float yourself indefinitely on 'established' status.
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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
And why, pray tell, do YOU think I deleted that thread? The mere fact that you're bewildered by my deleting it simply proves my point.

Since you asked, and to be perfectly honest, I think you deleted it because you didn't like the fact that people weren't sympathizing with you.

And how does my bewilderment that somebody would delete an entire conversation "prove your point" that you're persecuted for your wealth?

quote:
No one has EVER apologized to me directly for all of the things that were said to and about me in that thread.
Yes they did. I know I did. Many others did. You didn't choose to register those apologies, possibly because they were given among expressions of anger at the fact that you deleted our posts without any warning.

quote:
On top of that, I DO get picked on because when I try to comment on something, it turns into "Well, you just say that because you have money" or some crap like that. It always comes down to I just don't understand and therefore no one has to pay attention.
If you can link me to ONE instance of this having happened when it was NOT a totally salient part of the topic, I will believe you and never say that you're choosing to be oversensitive to this issue ever again.

quote:
Well, YOU obviously don't understand how much it hurts for people to constantly comment about how kids whose parents pay for their school are brats who don't really appreciate their education.
I guess I don't, because my dad snorted my substantial college fund up his nose in the late 80s and I ended up with zero college education because of it. YOU obviously don't understand how much that hurts, because you haven't had to live through it. What is your point, exactly? Neither of us has walked in the other's shoes, so why try to force each other to see the world through the other's eyes? It will never happen.

I told you in the thread you deleted AND in the subsequent thread on the topic that I don't believe that ALL "rich kids" are unappreciative of the gift they've been given. I told you that I know several kids whose parents paid their way through school, and not only are they appropriately grateful of their fortunate life, they are some of my closest friends and favorite people in the world. If that doesn't prove that I'm not some anti-wealth bogeyman, I don't know what does. What more do you want from me on this particular topic? What more do you want from ANY of us on this topic?

quote:
Which is what I was TRYING to point out with the deleted thread. For which I was promptly attacked. And then I was attacked for deleting a thread in which I was attacked to the point that it made me cry.
Yes - and once again, we "attacked" you because you deleted our comments. Do you not understand what that meant to us? It meant that YOU did not see our experiences and thoughts as valid - in fact, they were so invalid to you that you wiped them from the board so that nobody else could ever read them. It was rude and inconsiderate, and it showed exactly what you thought of all of us. Hurt feelings or no, what right did you have to destroy a day's worth of conversation we were all having with one another? You disrespected us and essentially told us by your actions that you felt that you were the only one in that thread who mattered. THAT is why we were angry with you. As we've tried to tell you then and since.

quote:
You know, when I mention something about needing a new dishwasher and someone makes a post essentially saying that I should just wash them by hand...that hurts.
I'm not being facetious here - why does that hurt? Is it the way they said it? Can you link me to that post so that I can understand why that comment hurt you? Because I probably would have offered the same suggestion. If you don't have a dishwasher that works, wash 'em by hand. I mean, it's sensible, isn't it? I don't understand why that comment hurt you, or how it was an attack for your wealth.

quote:
When I try to discuss anything about health care and all anyone will say to me is that I only think X because apparently I am just rolling in it, that hurts. And apparently, no one ever thinks about that kind of thing. And when I try to point it out, all of a sudden I'M the one being judgmental.
When did this happen? I'm not saying it never did, mind you - I just don't remember ever seeing that.

Pearce, you take this far too seriously. It's not good for you to dwell on this topic. It's obviously a continuing source of anger and hurt for you. Why? Nobody here is trying to attack you. As far as I can tell, just about everybody here really likes you and considers you a friend. I can't for the life of me figure out how you're being persecuted on this forum. Why can't you take it at face value when we tell you that we never meant to "attack" you and that we continue to not attack you? Isn't it good enough that your friends are all here saying that they're supportive of you and that what you perceived as attacks or jabs weren't given in that spirit at all?

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by Kwea:
As long as that isn't ALL you do. [Wink]


Honestly, I still love this place. I think that most people do, and that is why it is worth fighting for, as long as that doesn't become ALL you do here. [Smile]

In my experience, any forum worth belonging to fluctuates this way - periods of relative peace, periods of relative battle. The nice thing is that just about everybody's still friends with everybody else through it all. [Smile]
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Bob_Scopatz
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Rotar Mode,

Thanks for the clarification. I was genuinely concerned because at least part of me thinks it is very unpleasant to drag everyong else at Hatrack through a disagreement I'm having with just one other person. It really sucks.

I don't think your post was bad in any way.

Thanks again!

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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:
quote:
Originally posted by Kwea:
As long as that isn't ALL you do. [Wink]


Honestly, I still love this place. I think that most people do, and that is why it is worth fighting for, as long as that doesn't become ALL you do here. [Smile]

In my experience, any forum worth belonging to fluctuates this way - periods of relative peace, periods of relative battle. The nice thing is that just about everybody's still friends with everybody else through it all. [Smile]
Awwww.
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Libbie
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HUGS! (not drugs)
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pH
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quote:
I guess I don't, because my dad snorted my substantial college fund up his nose in the late 80s and I ended up with zero college education because of it. YOU obviously don't understand how much that hurts, because you haven't had to live through it.
Do you see me pointing that out every single time you post something? No. There is the difference. Whenever I post something that someone disagrees with, they always bring up money, which is a crock.

quote:
Yes - and once again, we "attacked" you because you deleted our comments.
I was attacked in the ORIGINAL THREAD which is why I deleted it. I don't know how many more times I can say that. And considering that the purpose of the original thread was to pretty much say, "I've seen a lot of these kinds of comments here, and whether or not you guys mean them towards me, they really hurt my feelings," I fail to see where there was any room to disagree. Unless we have a psychic connection and you can tell exactly how I feel.

quote:
Pearce, you take this far too seriously. It's not good for you to dwell on this topic. It's obviously a continuing source of anger and hurt for you. Why? Nobody here is trying to attack you.
Because if I just let it go, it will keep happening. And keep happening. And keep happening. And as I TRIED to explain in that damn thread, I put up with enough of that crap in real life. Why shouldn't I dwell on it? Did anyone offer an apology? No. Why should I forgive people who don't even care that they're hurting me? That's why I think it's ridiculous to say that there's no attack intended, since I tried to point out from the beginning that certain things hurt my feelings because they felt like attacks. The board as a whole was informed and responded by...attacking me.

-pH

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lem
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quote:
Just for another example:

If you look in my OCD thread and find the part where I talk about my therapist calling me names and being mean to me, you'll also find at least one comment stating that what the person though I was REALLY upset about was "How DARE someone speak to me like that!"

That's really, REALLY hurtful. I mean, there I was talking about something that had upset me to no end because not only had someone picked on me, but my THERAPIST had picked on me....and it somehow is still interpreted from the "You're a snob" angle.

I just re-read that thread. What I saw was a girl (you) who was in a really bad time in your life. You shared lots of painful experiences and lots of hatrackers gathered around to support you.

I saw where you wanted to get the therapist in trouble for calling you names. I saw where hatrackers, with good intentions, talked about how your approach doing that might be ineffective. It might even validate the therapist's (who we agree was rude) assessment.

I did not see people gang up on you about money. You may feel that way. I can see where you are making those jumps, but I believe that they were jumps.

I certainly don't care you have money--it is a non-issue to me.

Do you always make it that hard for people to be supportive?

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pH
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They're not being supportive when I've just had my feelings hurt and when I've just had my trust betrayed, and their response is "Oh, I think you're really just angry that someone would dare speak to you that way." That's not supportive in the least.

-pH

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Kwea
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The people I listed on that list weren't like nfl though, they were people who made Hatrack LESS due to their presence.

I do understand what you meant though....I just wanted to be sure no one thought I missed the ones I listed. [Smile]


pH, there is a difference between insensitivity and hate.

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pH
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And? If I have flat-out pointed out something that's hurting me and asked people not to do it and they go ahead and keep doing it, then they're pretty much actively trying to hurt me, whether or not they're motivated by insensitivity. Especially when what I'm asking is something fairly simple.

-pH

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Kwea
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pH, YOU are the one who keeps posting things, very personal thing, here at Hatrack. I am not saying don't, but if you ask for advice then sometimes you might hear things that you don't want to hear.


Notice that I am not one of the people commenting in those threads you have issues with. I don't touch them for a lot of reasons.....at least in part because you have said that you are often paranoid and obsessive about things. I understand that you have issues, don't we all....but I am always afraid that something I say in those types of thread will be taken wrong, and leave me on the defensive, even if I didn't mean to offend.


But I have read a lot of your threads, and a lot of the dog pile you claim is happening seems to be people telling you their opinions, even if you don't want to hear them.

By posting your issues here at Hatrack, what you are doing, intentionally or not, is inviting comments and opinions.


Perhaps some comments went too far, but you can't force people to be sorry, and complaining about how they aren't is counterproductive. Of they don't know what they are talking about, and none of their points have any validity, why are you so upset by it? They don't know you, or your situation, so they are wrong.

End of story.

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
Do you see me pointing that out every single time you post something? No. There is the difference. Whenever I post something that someone disagrees with, they always bring up money, which is a crock.

That directly implies that *I* bring up your wealth every time you post something. Link me to ANYWHERE where I have done so, Pearce. If you can't link me to such a thread, then please stop accusing me of persecuting you for your wealth, because that's obviously a lie.

quote:
I was attacked in the ORIGINAL THREAD which is why I deleted it. I don't know how many more times I can say that.
NO YOU WERE NOT, and I don't know how many more times I can say that, nor how many more times you're going to incorrectly insist that we all dogpiled you. You invited us to participate by sharing our thoughts on the subject of spoiled rich kids. We did. You didn't like them, so you declared that we were attacking you, even though exactly NONE of the posts specified that YOU were one of the evil, spoiled rich kids. Then you deleted the thread.

I've seen you declare that Hatrack is "full of a$$holes" and similarly insulting, blanket statements directed toward the forum as a whole. Why do you expect special consideration of your feelings when you won't provide the same courtesy to the other forum users here? How unfair.

quote:
And considering that the purpose of the original thread was to pretty much say, "I've seen a lot of these kinds of comments here, and whether or not you guys mean them towards me, they really hurt my feelings," I fail to see where there was any room to disagree.
That's not how I remember it. I remember you stating that you were sick of getting that vibe from people, and that you didn't understand why people even thought that way in the first place. So, many of us offered anecdotal examples suggesting how we or other people may have come up with those opinions, to which you took personal offense as if they were stating that you specifically had done these things. Of course, there's no way to know who is remembering things correctly now.

quote:
Because if I just let it go, it will keep happening. And keep happening. And keep happening.
No, it will not. It's not happening now! Good God! WHERE ELSE has it happened? I don't know about other areas of your life, but it hasn't happened here, at least as far as I can tell. Unless I'm just totally missing entire huge threads of you being trampled all over because you're well-off. I sort of doubt that much material is slipping by me, considering I read Hatrack every single day.

quote:
Why shouldn't I dwell on it?
Because it's making you react badly to every single comment you read, apparently, and it's making you carry a grudge against people who are TRYING to be your friends.

quote:

Did anyone offer an apology? No. Why should I forgive people who don't even care that they're hurting me?

How many times do I have to say it?

Yes, poeple did apologize. I apologized, and I remember other people apologizing, too. You continue to insist that nobody did, but that is simply untrue. Stop insulting me and others by INSISTING that we never apologized to you when we DID.

quote:
That's why I think it's ridiculous to say that there's no attack intended, since I tried to point out from the beginning that certain things hurt my feelings because they felt like attacks. The board as a whole was informed and responded by...attacking me.
*Sigh*

This is infuriating.

I know when I'm beating my head against a wall, and I refuse to do it. There is no reasoning with you. You only want to see things YOUR way, but you expect nobody else to see things THEIR way, even when the majority of people here agree that what actually happened is contrary to what you think happened. Fine. I don't care. I don't care if you think I did attack you or if you think I am attacking you now. I don't care if you think I'm a horrible, evil person who's out to get you. I don't care if you believe that every word I type is some kind of weird insult directed at your social station. I don't care.

However, I am never going to participate in any thread in which you are taking a major part again, because I am thoroughly disgusted by the fact that you can't let a single past incident go, and that you continue to insist that Hatrack is "full of a$$holes." This is a forum full of caring, generous people who have given up their valuable time to hear your thoughts, share your happiness, discuss ideas that are important to you, and give you comfort and a shoulder to cry on when you've needed it - just because they care about you. You, Pearce, as a person.

You repay all these people by continuing to insist that we're out to get you and insisting that you never received any apologies when your feelings were hurt. You call us names and insinuate that we all hate you.

What a waste of time.

It's a shame that avoiding your threads means I'll have less room to participate here, but I will not interact with a person who insults me and the people I consider friends. Of course, now that I've stuck my neck out and said what I feel about this whole fiasco, I'll probably be kicked off the forum or at least completely ostracized, since just about everybody here is a big Pearce fan in spite of your insistence that the entire forum hates you and that we're all a$$holes.

If anybody wants to yell at me for standing up to Pearce, you are most welcome to email me so that we don't have a giant flamewar on the forums. I won't yell back, but I realize that a lot of you dearly love Pearce and that I probably ticked you off by saying this, so if you want to talk to me about it, you are welcome to write. mistrettaphoto at gmail.com

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TomDavidson
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quote:
Of course, now that I've stuck my neck out and said what I feel about this whole fiasco, I'll probably be kicked off the forum or at least completely ostracized...
We're also all contrarians. As you may have noticed, the best way to ensure that something never happens here is to predict it aloud.
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Dagonee
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Except that by predicting we're not going to do it, you've created an irreconcilable paradox that's going to suck us all into a singularity and spit us out in an alternate universe.

Way to go, Tom.

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quidscribis
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[ROFL]

The Tom and Dags show, at it again. [Smile]

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TomDavidson
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quote:

Way to go, Tom.

Hey, don't thank me. You're the one who just saved the universe by predicting its destruction on Hatrack.

Oh, wait...

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quidscribis
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>_< Noooo! Stop the madness!
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pH
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quote:
NO YOU WERE NOT, and I don't know how many more times I can say that, nor how many more times you're going to incorrectly insist that we all dogpiled you. You invited us to participate by sharing our thoughts on the subject of spoiled rich kids.
That is NOT what I did. What I did was to try to point out that some of the things that were being said here were hurting my feelings and that I'd really appreciate it if people could be more considerate. That is what I said. This has nothing to do with me wanting to only see things my way. This has to do with me wanting people to accept the fact that some of the things they say hurt my feelings and to be considerate enough to pay attention when I ask them not to do it. Do you want to argue that the things that were said DIDN'T hurt my feelings?

-pH

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TomDavidson
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quote:
This has to do with me wanting people to accept the fact that some of the things they say hurt my feelings and to be considerate enough to pay attention when I ask them not to do it.
Pearce, I think you may be confusing consideration with obedience a little bit.
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King of Men
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quote:
Do you see me pointing that out every single time you post something? No. There is the difference. Whenever I post something that someone disagrees with, they always bring up money, which is a crock.
Well, that's just not true. You wouldn't say that if you were poor.
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pH
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quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
quote:
This has to do with me wanting people to accept the fact that some of the things they say hurt my feelings and to be considerate enough to pay attention when I ask them not to do it.
Pearce, I think you may be confusing consideration with obedience a little bit.
No. I'm not. Because if something is really hurting me and is relatively easy to fix, it's inconsiderate to not make an effort to fix it. But considering that I tried to phrase the original post as a request and was subsequently jumped all over, I really don't know what I can do to convince anyone otherwise.

-pH

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Dagonee
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quote:
Because if something is really hurting me and is relatively easy to fix, it's inconsiderate to not make an effort to fix it.
But when the request is aimed at people's expression of opinion, and doesn't seem to leave any room for expression of that opinion even when not directed at you, it's not easy to fix.
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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
Do you want to argue that the things that were said DIDN'T hurt my feelings?

-pH

No; I don't want to talk to you about anything ever again - at least not here. You're unreasonable and unpredictable. I don't like that, so I'm choosing to have no further interaction with you on these forums, aside from this thread, because it is about our forum conflicts. If you feel the need to discuss anything with me, I posted my email address in this thread and you are as welcome to discuss this matter OFF the forums with me as is everybody else.

Thanks for completely disregarding all the rest of the points I made. I suppose in that respect, you are not unpredictable.

Bye now.

[ November 27, 2006, 12:50 AM: Message edited by: Libbie ]

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Stan the man
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Pearce, breathe in, breathe out. An' I am going to agree with Pearce on that it was quite an attack on her on the one topic. The one that was locked for a bit by Pop's anyway. Question: Is it polite, in that if someone were to request that the word "god" not be said in their presence (in vain), to say it? Don't try telling me I am mixing apples with oranges here. I'm not. I'm using something some of you would probably have a moral standing on. If you knew that person didn't like that. Would you use it in their presence? Would that not be inconsiderate?

I've studied world war 2 since I was old enough to read. The word I get all riled up on is Nazi. People have a tendancy to call me that because of my studies. Am I wrong to get upset? I don't think so. Maybe you might think me wrong if I get a little more than just upset about it, but guaranteed, they don't call me that anymore.

So tell me how you want to construe this considerate vs. obediance. Give me a good one, please. Something that can compete with what my supervisor at work can construe out of his one brain cell every morning at muster.

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cmc
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I don't hate anyone on Hatrack... It's not happening here for me, well, unless someone hates me... Which is pretty unlikely... Since I don't know anyone... Unless they hate me for how I post... In which case that's silly... So, yeah, no Hatrack hate for me...
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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by Stan the man:
Pearce, breathe in, breathe out. An' I am going to agree with Pearce on that it was quite an attack on her on the one topic. The one that was locked for a bit by Pop's anyway. Question: Is it polite, in that if someone were to request that the word "god" not be said in their presence (in vain), to say it? Don't try telling me I am mixing apples with oranges here. I'm not. I'm using something some of you would probably have a moral standing on. If you knew that person didn't like that. Would you use it in their presence? Would that not be inconsiderate?

I think it is a bit apples-to-oranges, since Pearce was not actually being called any names or being accused herself of being an intolerably spoiled rich kid. She was called out on expressing some opinions that others too offense to, but so was everybody else in that thread.

Expressing an opinion is not the same as using offensive language. We should be free to express our opinions about any topic without somebody telling us months later that we can't talk about how we feel about Topic X because it makes her feel sad. If she doesn't want to feel badly about things we want to discuss, then she doesn't need to read the thread.

quote:
People have a tendancy to call me that because of my studies. Am I wrong to get upset? I don't think so.
Of course not, but you're making the implication that Pearce was actually called spoiled and ungrateful in the original thread. She never was - not once. Unless you count the moment when she said that she never dates guys who don't come from wealthy families because she thinks they're all going to expect her to give them money, and somebody (I don't remember who) told her that she was demonstrating the same kind of prejudice that she disliked in other people by holding that view. I guess that MIGHT be construed as her being called "spoiled," if you really stretch your imagination.

In fact, many people, myself included, expressed the opinion that Pearce did not appear to be the kind of atrocious rich kid who acts ungrateful and spoiled, but instead a serious student and a hard worker who really felt grateful that she had this great opportunity.

But, like I already said, the thread is gone forever, so we can't go back and look to see what actually happened. Pearce has her recollection; I have mine.

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pH
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quote:
Unless you count the moment when she said that she never dates guys who don't come from wealthy families because she thinks they're all going to expect her to give them money
I never used the word "wealthy" when I was talking about that.

-pH

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Libbie
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I believe your exact words, if memory serves, were "I don't date guys who don't have money."

Edited to add: By the way, I really don't care who you date and for what reasons. I don't give two figs about your love life or your reasons for running it the way you do. I am just pointing out the one part of that thread (that I recall) which I can understand your feeling insulted over.

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pH
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quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:
I believe your exact words, if memory serves, were "I don't date guys who don't have money."

No. That is not what I said at all. I said that I have trouble dating guys who have less money because they seem to assume that they are entitled to ask me to pay for their things. That has nothing to do with family, and it was included in my mentioning that I find it incredibly frustrating that my "friends" seemed to think that I should be their taxi and thought it was okay to expect me to pay for everything. In fact, I followed up with the example of an ex-boyfriend who came from a very wealthy family who regularly had me go pay his electric bill because his electricity kept being turned off. My whole point was that (going back to what I had originally said, that it bothered me that people seem to think that all college kids who have things have huge entitlement complexes) most of the entitlement complexes I run into in my life are from people who think that they're "real" and grew up "hard."

-pH

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ladyday
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I don't think it's right to talk -about- someone on the boards when you refuse to talk -to- them on the boards. Isn't that at least part of the problem with GS's treatment of Bob, too? If you want to write someone off, write them off, but continuing to talk about them to other people seems wrong to me.

Edit - lol, nevermind I suppose I misunderstood the 'I never want to speak to you again' remark.

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Libbie
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Hm - well, I guess I can't go back and see whether I'm remembering it correctly or not, so why worry?
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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by cmc:
I don't hate anyone on Hatrack... It's not happening here for me, well, unless someone hates me... Which is pretty unlikely... Since I don't know anyone... Unless they hate me for how I post... In which case that's silly... So, yeah, no Hatrack hate for me...

I hate you with the passion of a thousand Sith lords.

EDIT: I hate you so much, I already called a hit on you.
http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=19835

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by ladyday:
I don't think it's right to talk -about- someone on the boards when you refuse to talk -to- them on the boards. Isn't that at least part of the problem with GS's treatment of Bob, too? If you want to write someone off, write them off, but continuing to talk about them to other people seems wrong to me.

Didn't I say that I'd only talk to her in this thread, and not in any others (and also in email)? That was what I intended to say, since this thread is about personal conflicts, and all.

If I didn't say that, I'll edit it into my post, because I intended it to be there in the first place. Thank you for pointing that out to me.

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cmc
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Karma's a doozie... ; )

I was upset I didn't see my name and personal information come up...

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ladyday
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quote:
No; I don't want to talk to you about anything ever again - at least not here. You're unreasonable and unpredictable. I don't like that, so I'm choosing to have no further interaction with you on these forums. If you feel the need to discuss anything with me, I posted my email address in this thread and you are as welcome to discuss this matter OFF the forums with me as is everybody else.
That's what gave me the impression you were no longer willing to speak to pH on the boards.
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Lyrhawn
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I think the problem with the original thread were the parameters that Pearce imposed, they were almost designed to either induce silence or agreement.

If we didn't agree with you, it was percieved as an attack. If we disagreed, so as to say "it's been my experience that....not including you Pearce," then you STILL took offense, and told us that such blanket statements that specifically unincluded you would still offend you as if the special provision had never been made. So, we could either agree with you, or be silent, or offend you.

That's not really conducive to free thought and expression, especially not in a thread that one would think discussion would be open and welcome. Especially since if I were to say "I don't date girls who have money, they're stuck up and only want to date other rich people," you'd take vast offense I think, but you're for some reason allowed to make blanket statements about guys without money.

It's your special exceptions and discussion rules that bothered me in that thread. If you aren't willing to hear an opposing opinion or have questions asked of you regarding your position, you shouldn't ask the question to begin with. That's just how I feel.

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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:
I believe your exact words, if memory serves, were "I don't date guys who don't have money."

No. That is not what I said at all. I said that I have trouble dating guys who have less money because they seem to assume that they are entitled to ask me to pay for their things. That has nothing to do with family, and it was included in my mentioning that I find it incredibly frustrating that my "friends" seemed to think that I should be their taxi and thought it was okay to expect me to pay for everything. In fact, I followed up with the example of an ex-boyfriend who came from a very wealthy family who regularly had me go pay his electric bill because his electricity kept being turned off. My whole point was that (going back to what I had originally said, that it bothered me that people seem to think that all college kids who have things have huge entitlement complexes) most of the entitlement complexes I run into in my life are from people who think that they're "real" and grew up "hard."

-pH

I know someone who is incredibly wealthy, I'm sure she is probably wealthier than you, but anyway. The point is that I hated going anywhere with her because she always offered to pay for everything and that made me feel like she was trying to show off her money. In fact, she liked to talk about all the things she did back in Colorado like riding the Budwiser horses, how she paid her tuition up front and how she had a private air plane. She was such a snob.

I don't mind if you're rich, just don't flaunt it.

Not that I think you are anything like her Pearce.
But I am a little weirded out that you would use money as a basis for choosing who to date. Not all poor people covet your money, you know. However, I think that Michael is a good match and you should stick with him. [Wink]
Besides, we both know you made all your money pimping me out in the streets of New Orleans.

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pH
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My question is, how could it be at all productive to discuss anything with you by email if you're absolutely dead-set in the idea that you've done no wrong and I am apparently unreasonable? Most of your posts on this thread have been pretty mean-spirited. I'm not that masochistic.

And on top of that, again, you missed the entire point of the thread. The point of that particular post was for me to make a request. There WAS no question beyond "Will you guys please be more considerate?" That was the question.

-pH

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pH
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quote:
Besides, we both know you made all your money pimping me out in the streets of New Orleans.
Ho, gimme my money!

-pH

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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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quote:
Originally posted by pH:
quote:
Besides, we both know you made all your money pimping me out in the streets of New Orleans.
Ho, gimme my money!

-pH

Sorry daddy, I've not been working this week! I'm still recovering from the crabs. It itches so bad!
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