It is important to note now, at the very beginning of my tale, that there was nothing mysterious about Merv’s origins. He was born to a farmer whose greatest distinction was his ability to pop his arm in and out of its socket. Merv had no distant relatives who might secretly be royalty. He grew up as neither a charismatic leader nor a tragic outcast. Not a single traveler approached him with a quest, and his parents died naturally of unromantic lingering illnesses.
The prophecies mentioned in this story are not about Merv: he didn’t have the White Sword, he didn’t have the Fire Mark and he didn’t look a thing like the deceased king and queen of Delior, may God rest their souls. What he did look like was a broad shouldered man whose hands were never entirely clean, whose hair
If anyone is interested in doing a critique swap, please e-mail me your first chapter. If I like yours and you like mine, then we'll start a regular exchange.
I'm looking for a broad idea commentary rather than a small detail copy editing commentary. I'm still in the early phase of the book. Best, Laura henriksen.laura@yahoo.com
[ April 20, 2012, 06:50 PM: Message edited by: Kathleen Dalton Woodbury ]
Posted by enigmaticuser (Member # 9398) on :
Dang, I haven't done a swap in awhile. But this is an intriguing opening. It looks like something written by someone who looks at certain fantasy conventions and says "What, again?" I likes the sound a lot.
If broad commentary is what you're looking for, I'll pop you and email.