I point out long, compound sentences I find when I crit a story or novel, here's an almost record breaking one I found tonight.
quote: Few rock bands had hand drummers like me and it wasnÕt a music I had much experence playing with before but I had practiced with that type of music before and felt comfortable in working with them.
Too bad I discovered it in my "New Mage On The Block." I posted the first 13 lines of this novel a while back if anyone remembers after this long.
Posted by History (Member # 9213) on :
I used to have problems with long, compound, never-ending sentences that would just rattle on and on, like a senile rattlesnake with spinal arthritis,and what a jagged trail it would make in the desert sand, weaving back and forth as if made by a tipsy sailor, but that was before I learned that brevity was not only the soul of wit but the essence of clarity, and that a good writer is one that can not only make one word suffice for two, or more, but also have it convey a fuller and richer meaning that captures both the truth of the scene and the interest and imagination of the reader, just as "opalescence" is richer and fuller than "a pale shade with sparkles" or even "plain white"--if you known what I mean or, if not....
Posted by PB&Jenny (Member # 9200) on :
Ouch, ouch! Enough! I surrender! Posted by Reziac (Member # 9345) on :
Even without reading that link I realize mine isn't all that long. I wrote one today, on another thread, that might be twice as long. But I still found it ironic that I wrote it.
Posted by History (Member # 9213) on :
That was fun, actually. Is it really that bad?
Respectfully, Dr. Bob (stuck at the hospital in a blizzard)
