[This message has been edited by TL 601 (edited September 17, 2005).]
Posted by BuffySquirrel (Member # 2780) on :
I'm glad the title is fake...
I didn't find this too wordy and I did find it intriguing. I'd probably read on just to find out what on earth is happening.
Posted by wbriggs (Member # 2267) on :
I think this is literal, but I'm not sure. Possibilities: * It's metaphor; roads don't invade areas -- they just sit there. Let us know! * It's literal. I can't picture this. How thick is a road? In real life, the question makes no sense; it's a surface, and you could imagine it going to the center of the earth, or you could say it's only the top 5 feet, or 1 inch ... how does it keep from crumbling, given that roads aren't designed to fly through the air? (Or is it creeping?) Does it push things out of the way? * It's literal, within a sort of little-kid imagination: as if we were reading a story about the day the spinach casserole got up to lecture us (Calvin & Hobbes). There may be a way of dropping us a hint about this; if I knew this was what was happening, I'd be content.
Also, I would like more of Mary's reaction in the moment. If she thinks it's cute, what's happening, that pushes me toward option 3. One problem with this is that she can't see what's happening (unless she's in a helicopter!) so you'll have to use omniscient, and you can't have her reaction because she can't see it! Unless she somehow knows (because it's really in her imagination)?
Posted by wbriggs (Member # 2267) on :
Two other comments, now that I reread the text:
* Consider using past tense. At least, I see no reason not to. * I didn't understand what happened with the rain. If this is to tell us she's magic, or imagining it all, I didn't get it; if it's just scene-setting, I'd say strike it, and start with the magic road. (She calls it the Red Road, but we don't know why. If it's a street name, consider "Highway 320" or "Main Street." If it's her own name, explain. BTW, the Red Road in Lakota tradition means moderation.)
Posted by BuffySquirrel (Member # 2780) on :
I think it's a shame this has been taken down. It was one of the most original and imaginative pieces I've seen here at Hatrack. Maybe I should have stated that in my first post.
Posted by TL 601 (Member # 2730) on :
Thanks, Buffy. Nice of you.
Posted by djvdakota (Member # 2002) on :
TL, Buffy brings up a valid point.
One reason we post here is to help others learn--not just ourselves.
I find it VERY helpful to read the posts--as well as everyone's comments ABOUT the posts--in helping myself learn to write better.
Posted by TL 601 (Member # 2730) on :
Isn't there a way to log in to this site so I don't have to retype my name and password every time I want to post? I can't figure it out.
Now, Dakota, I sort of agree with that, and hand't considered it. I did have a reason for taking this down, though. 1) it relates to the LH flash challenge this week, and I didn't want anyone seeing this thread and then guessing my identity at Liberty Hall. 2) I'm not ready for readers yet. When I *am* ready for readers, I intend to workshop this here at hatrack -- and I was afraid if I left it up people would get bored with the idea of it, and then when I came back looking for readers, I would have none.
That was my thought process for pulling it.
Posted by wbriggs (Member # 2267) on :
The way I know of to not have to type in login info again is to use a browser that recognizes the form and puts it in automatically. Mozilla and Mozilla Firefox do this. I don't know how to do it in IE.
Posted by Elan (Member # 2442) on :
This site IS able to retain username and passwords so you don't have to re-type them each time you log on. I know; mine used to be set up that way. Sadly, I have inadvertantly deleted it when I cleansed my hard drive of cookies, and now I have to re-type my username and password anytime I want to post. And now I can't figure out how to patch that feature back in! Rats.
Posted by Beth (Member # 2192) on :
I seem to remember there was a little box you could check while posting that asked if it should remember your password. I don't remember! but I just had to do it a few days ago - it's got to be something incredibly simple, or I would have remembered it.
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
You can have the Hatrack web software save your username and password for a year at a time by selecting "preferences" (the middle choice between "register" and "faq") under Hatrack River Writers Workshop near the upper right hand corner of each page.
Near the bottom of the preferences page is
quote:Store Username & Password in browser memory for 1 year (otherwise you will have to type your username and password once per browser session)
with a "radio" button to the side that lets you choose Yes or No