Hello. This story is about 2200 words long, light sf, and I need readers to critique it. Here are the first 13. Thanks.
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Thomas thought the magma viewing rooms to be only rumors—until he saw one with his own eyes. He dropped the tray of food when he entered the room and soiled the dress of one of the room’s occupants.
“Well, are you going to stand there and gawk, or are you going to get me something to clean this with?” the woman said, upset. Thomas just stood three feet into the room, not paying her any attention. Finally, he was brought out of his trance; a man, presumably the woman’s husband, was shaking his arm.
“Leave, and bring your supervisor in,” he scathed.
Thomas blinked once, looked at the man and smiled. “Right away, sir,” he said as he tried to back out of the room, only to hit the wall. His face turned red and he left.
Posted by Lanius (Member # 2482) on :
I'd be happy to read your story. Please send as .rtf file.
[This message has been edited by Lanius (edited June 23, 2005).]
Posted by wbriggs (Member # 2267) on :
I'll read.
Posted by NewsBys (Member # 1950) on :
Sounds interesting. I'd like to read it.
Posted by Jeraliey (Member # 2147) on :
I'd be up for it.
Posted by cklabyrinth (Member # 2454) on :