I've noticed that between these outlined scenes, there is time that needs to take place. For various reasons, I don't feel comfortable just skipping ahead ("and they arrived in the city one month later...") But the parts between are kind of... boring. They aren't the action/drama/plot intense scenes that make the framework of my outline. In each case, its about a chapter from point A to point B, and my characters usually end up discussing stuff or reminding each other of the plot.
Any ideas on how to fix this? I'm stumped.
But I don't know how to make learning a new language interesting to read in a way that is pertinent to the plot.
How about a slightly humorous scene where the woman tries to explain something in English, but ends up saying something other than what she means. Or maybe she urgently tries to tell them something but it comes out all wrong.
If the month needs to be there, and no significant story points occur within it, likely the kindest thing you can do for your readers is to skip it and pick up the story a month later. If this occurs at the very beginning of the story, you could consider starting the story after the month, whith the characters already acquainted.
Or you can change your story around so that the plot or a subplot keep moving during that time.
I remember watching Raiders of the Lost Arc at the movies when I was a kid and remembering how different it was in that it went by like "BANG, BANG, BANG!" But it really didn't there were still the tedious lecture scenes, the little lovey-dovey scenes, and the monkey scenes. These scenes were there to give the viewer that little break so to catch up. As writers I feel it is important to do the same.
It is as easy as PIE:
Preparation
Information
Experience
(BTW: KDW, this is my acronym - terribly unoriginal - but unneeding of reference)
And if it's an adventure, why can't they encounter a little danger? Or why not an evening around the fire with another traveler telling stories? What else can intrude on their simple, safe journey to make things more interesting?
I agree with Meredith that you probably only need a few scattered scenes to cover the passage of time.
Use this time to give your reader a really good look at the characters and it won't be boring.
"every scene, sequence and passage of a good novel has to involve, contribute to and advance all three of its major attributes: theme, plot, characterization"
I've tried to implement this to keep depth to my writing. It helps me keep focus. As a writer, I don't want to ask someone to read something I wrote that I myself would not be interested in reading. I think that in my "boring parts," I was losing track of the fact that since not much was happening to plot, there isn't much to talk about. (My current WIP is mostly plot driven, I am hoping to flesh out the characterization thoroughly) But focusing on characterization on this bit may help.
One of the problems is that I painted myself into a corner. This mysterious woman doesn't speak their language, so its hard to show character as interactions are limited. But you all have given me some good ideas to work with. I think I'll investigate those a bit.
I've traveled a fair amount and there are almost always other ways to get things across besides spoken language. Transactions are particularly easy. But even complex ideas can be gotten across if you're creative enough. Of course there will be mistakes along the way and that can easily lead to humor.
Lack of a common language does not stop communication, it just changes it.
First, as a limited speaker, this woman can't participate as fully in the conversations and therefore the story (For example, nobody knows who she is or where she came from at this point). She likewise doesn't know who these people are that are taking her along with them.
Secondly, because learning a new language takes time, it has some length requirements to learn to speak. There are also some interesting interactions that can take place with miscommunication, and I already have a few of these that end up being central as this woman learns more, but for now it consists of nothing more than pointing at things and learning their names.
[This message has been edited by Teraen (edited October 23, 2009).]
quote:
(For example, nobody knows who she is or where she came from at this point). She likewise doesn't know who these people are that are taking her along with them.
But until these scenes unfold, it can be boring. My wife speaks a different language, and when we first dated it is incredible how much we didn't understand. My challenge is making the progression interesting.
he holds an eating utensil up "Fork"
He points to the breast of burden. "Horse"
Eating container "Bowl"
cooking container "Pot."
She will learn the language faster that way then just listening and slowly picking things up.
Also, if she taught them some of her words as they go, they might learn to speak to each other faster. I have seen that in some movies where exchanging of words for things and actions, they communicate faster.
A couple scenes showing how they are learning to speak, One at the beginning, one where they are making mistakes, and one where they are talking fairly clearly, would be all that is needed. One might also show a change of seasons to show the time. You might even have them spend time some place, like where the hunting is good or the fishing is good, resting, tending an injured animal, so there is a reason for them to take time, traveling a month to get to some place that is only a few days away.
"Breast of burden." (Grins)
You could make the story about the character learning a new language, or make learning the new language an action the character is taking for a larger goal, or both, which is what you seem to be describing. Learning a second language is a challenge, but it is also something that is not notably rare or unique. To make it compelling in a story setting you could add or beef up an obstacle so that the outcome is in doubt, either of being able to learn to adequately employ the language at all, or learning it fast enough to be of use.
*****
If you're pointing to things, you better have the right word for what's in front of you. If you're teaching the word "fork," you better not be holding a spoon or knife or spork. If you're indicating a breast of burden, it'd better not be a mule when you say "horse." (Or "woman," for that matter.)
There's the old story, probably an urban legend, of how "kangaroo" actually means "what the hell are you saying?" in some native Australian aborigine dialect...
Keep them coming! My future readers will thank you for it!
The successful "down" scene to which philocinemas referred were all done like this. If the words is just boring then I don't want to pay for them.
The motivation to communicate should make her try over and over again to get her message across, even if she doesn't succeed until the end.
And she should try different things and get different results, since supposedly only the insane try the same thing over and over again in spite of getting the same results.
Also consider this. When you are getting them from point A to point B, and you are doing some character building during that time, what is the worst thing that could happen?
Let me give an idea. In my fantasy novel, End of All, I was getting my two elves from point A to point B. They had to go through a swamp before they came to the tar of anger.
At first, it was just going to be them talking while they traveled through the swamp. Character building, basically. That would have turned out to be a short scene. Then I thought, what is the worst thing that could happen? But before that, I thought, what is something crazy that can happen?
So, Skyla is a little on edge from being turded on by the black Turds, birds that eat all day, then find people to crap on. They live for it. Anyway, she had been crapped on, and will now stink for three days or so.
A pink swamp monkey pops out of no where, and she freaks out and zaps it with her lightning powers. Oops, killed it. A bunch pink swamp monkeys with blue tails show up to examin their dead friend. Anyway, it turned out to be a funny scene.
Then I thought, so what is the worst thing that could happen? Well the monkeys could get violent and hurt one of the MC's. But then I thought no, a dangerous swamp creature attacks and disappears in the water again. So that made for a tense scene and ended up with Cloud, the guy elf, bitten by this thing, and he will die if Skyla doesn't get him to the bat folk in time to heal his wound. Now the journey from point A to point B got really interesting.
(I didn't proof read this post, so I'm sure there are errors in it.)
Sick of your characters sounding like you? Check this out.