This afternoon, I wandered through my apartment, then my apartment complex, rubbing various materials and muttering to myself in an attempt to conjure a phrase that would help readers hear a particular sound. I felt ridiculous, and I didn't succeed. So, I'm trying a new approach.
Do you think a particular author excels in describing sounds? What are examples of that author's works?
I'm starting this topic in Open Discussions instead of Discussing Published Hooks & Books in case someone wants to share their experiences with finding effective words and phrases for sounds. Please let me know whether there are other ways!
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
It's been my experience that readers are generally resistant to spelled out audibles, especially made up ones. But aural sensation descriptions are too easily comparisons that do anything but clarify. Aurals create further confusion over whether to bracket them as dialogue, run them in inline, in roman text, or in italics.
What I've found effective in reading and in writing is using only well-recognized onomatopoeia, by turns a rhetorical scheme and/or a trope. Onomatopoeic words just run in and are nearly invisible. They can be formed into verbs, nouns, or any figure of speech. They're sometimes formatted like interjections with italics and exclamation points, Keith Laumer and David Drake do that with spoken onomatopoeia and aural sensations. Crack!. Crash, bang, bam, clatter, "crunch," crinkle, grind, roil, slap, snap, swish, screech, squeal, crackle, pop, buzz, hiss, thump, scritch, etc.; spoken onomatopoeia, wow, whoa, hah, etc. Accompanying tactile sensation descriptions might enhance the meaning of onomatopoeic words. My guiding principle is an onomatopoeic word or phrase must be in the dictionary.
[This message has been edited by extrinsic (edited January 07, 2009).]
Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :
Another approach might be to describe the effect of the sound on the character hearing it, instead of trying to describe the actual sound.
Posted by KayTi (Member # 5137) on :
I've noticed lately that a lot of authors use similies to draw you into what something sounds like (or tastes like, or what a particular event/sound/object causes the MC to feel.)
I'll try to pull an example or two as I'm reading.
Like the thunderclap from the end of times, the ice damn broke and tumbled down the waterfall.
Marvin's heels crunched in the gravel underfoot.
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
I'm inclined to spell it out the way it sounds---which is a very subjective category, because it's not going to sound the same to me as it is to somebody else, and the more complicated it gets with the different languages and dialects one can filter these noises through...
Failing that, I'm inclined to be comic-strip funny with the sounds---using genuine words or names to illustrate the sounds. I've remembered some of the sound-words in Walt Kelly's "Pogo" ever since I read them---things like "Wau-KEE-gan," used to illustrate an incident involving a bicycle pump and a character's head stuck in his turtle shell. I rarely have opportunity to practice this, though...
(..."the ice damn broke"...?)
Posted by extrinsic (Member # 8019) on :
Wasn't offered for copyediting or critique.
Posted by Crystal Stevens (Member # 8006) on :
One thing to watch when comparing a sound to something every reader of the story may know is making sure the comparison is something familiar with the POV character or the MC. For example: One of my stories doesn't have a single person from Earth in it, and I found myself trying to make references several times that could only be known by someone from Earth.
I realize this is a completely different topic, but it occurred to me as I read through the posts on this one.
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Crystal, that's a good point. Sounds can be portrayed with various forms of onomatopoeia, similes, and metaphors. That makes the strengths and weaknesses of similes metaphors important for sound portrayal.
As for onomatopoeia (word or phrase imitating the sound it denotes), I tend to agree with Extrinsic that the word or phrase must be in the dictionary, except when it is to add humor or show innocence. Why fabricate new words when too many beautiful and dusty words exist? Also, readers look for excuses to think a new author is lazy.
*Edited to correct UBBCode for linking.
[This message has been edited by aspirit (edited January 07, 2009).]
Posted by C L Lynn (Member # 8007) on :
I love to try to capture sound in my writing. My spell checker hates me.
Not that this contribution helps anyone. Oh, well.
Posted by Cheyne (Member # 7710) on :
I like to use sensual similes to communicate sounds and smells etc. I read a terrific one this week describing the smell of cooking liver; (not a direct quote as the book is not here) - the metallic smell of fingers dirty from handling coins.
Posted by Crystal Stevens (Member # 8006) on :
Hey, watch it! I tend to like liver & onions when it's fixed right. Good for you, too.
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Any more suggestions of authors or stories to put descriptions of sound in context?
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
I recently read a short story, "Pages from Cold Harbor" by Richard Grant, that was chock-full of imagery, including sounds.
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Philo, I don't think I can locate a copy of "Pages" without keeping an eye on e-bay. Where did you find the copy you read?
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
I read it in Isaac Asimov's Robots. It is a short anthology from Asimov's printed back in 1991. There are seventeen stories in it, and so far they have all been very good.
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
BTW, I've seen this anthology in various libraries. You may want to try there. Grant's mainly a novelist, not sure about presently, but his writing style seems to lend itself to strong imagery. I would guess that other things he has written would also make use of this.
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Robots's not at my library. Maybe other Hatrackers have more luck.
I'll look into Grant's novels. Thank you.
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
You could try to locate the story in its original appearance in Asimov's, June 1985...
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Any ideas where? E-bay is the only place I've seen back issues of Asimov's.
That issue would be cool to own for other reasons.
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
Doesn't anybody have access to dealers or used bookstores anymore?
Posted by aspirit (Member # 7974) on :
Dealers? Like at conventions?
I don't remember old magazine issues at any of the used bookstores I've visited. They're generally packed with "well-loved" paperbacks.
Maybe this is the wrong approach. Instead of wasting time tracking down material that may or may not help, I can write and read what I already own. I'll figure it out, even if I have to roam like a drunken homeless woman to do so.
Posted by Robert Nowall (Member # 2764) on :
More like somebody who sells old books and magazines by mail. You used to be able to find their addresses in the SF mags; a quick glance in a couple of current issues shows one each; I recognize both names and have (I think) bought stuff from both.
Online? Well, there must be somebody who's selling online. It's "been some time" so I don't know who's out there. (It'll cost you, though.)
Posted by philocinemas (Member # 8108) on :
aspirit, I will try to keep an eye out for something more recent and readily available. I'm sorry you didn't have any luck with finding it.
