Hatrack River Writers Workshop: Similes and Metaphors

This is topic Similes and Metaphors in forum Open Discussions About Writing at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.

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http://www.hatrack.com/ubb/writers/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=002397

Posted by Varishta (Member # 2789) on :

Do you employ them in your writing?

Do you enjoy creating them?

Can they overwhelm a piece, like too much vermouth in a martini?

Posted by JmariC (Member # 2698) on :

Yes

Yes

Yes

Posted by Survivor (Member # 213) on :

Yes, not really, and I don't care how much vermouth a martini has, it's not like I'd drink it anyway.

If you enjoy using metaphors (and similies) more than being literal, then you'll definitely overuse them. And you should go back and expunge every instance that can be eliminated. Also, if you particularly enjoy using them, you probably won't use them very naturally, so you should go back to the necessary ones and see if you can exchange them for something less flashy.

A good metaphor goes right through the parsing filter of the reader and impacts perception directly. A flashy metaphor will stop dead before it even gets past the reader's eyes.

Posted by Christine (Member # 1646) on :

Some add flavor but I've seen them overused, even by writers I would otherwise consider good.

Similies are like cayenne pepper...a little goes a long way.

Posted by EricJamesStone (Member # 1681) on :

In writing speculative fiction, I generally avoid using metaphors, just in case the reader might take them literally.

I use similes rarely; usually to compare something unfamiliar to something the reader might be familiar with.

I tend to think that speculative fiction should be interesting enough on its own that spicing it up with metaphor or simile is unnecessary. But if one is writing a literary piece in which nothing happens except some musing over a teacup, one probably needs all the spicing up one can get.

Posted by Varishta (Member # 2789) on :

I don't know what to do about metaphors/similes. They keep popping up in my writing like dandelions... (Agh! You see??)

But seriously -- I really do like a good one from time to time, but if I see too many on a page, I think, "That person's trying too hard."

How many is too many, though? How many is acceptable? Sue Monk Kidd got away with hundreds of 'em in The Secret Life of Bees, and no one made a fuss. (Or did they? Wouldn't you just love to see the original MS, with lines and lines of pen marks?)

Posted by Beth (Member # 2192) on :

The International Metaphor Committee (ICM) released the 2005 Metaphor Standard in April; see www.icm.com/metaphor_protocol.html

I think they specify no more than 3.7 metaphors per seven manuscript pages, unless you've had your work classified as "lyrical." They've got an application for that on the website as well.

Posted by 'Graff (Member # 2648) on :

You are aware that link actually sends you to some church's website?

It was quite amusing. It seems their sermon on Metaphor use hasn't been put up yet.

They had better get it up there soon.

-----------
Wellington

Posted by wbriggs (Member # 2267) on :

I don't think it's possible to write without metaphors and similes. It certainly enriches things. (There's a metaphor: enrichment, being used to refer to something that has nothing to do with riches. They creep in.)

But I rarely use them consciously.

Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :

One of the things to worry about with similes, and with metaphors to some extent, is the cliche potential. If you can avoid using them, you decrease your risk of writing stuff that will be considered cliched.

Posted by EricJamesStone (Member # 1681) on :

You should avoid similes like the plague. Therefore, before using a simile, check the following:

1. Is the simile carried by fleas?
2. Is the simile characterized by swollen, tender, inflamed lymph glands?
3. Does the simile cause symptoms such as chills, fever, or headaches?
4. Has the simile killed about a third of the population of Europe?
5. Has the simile ever been used as a biological weapon?

If you answered yes to any of the questions above, your simile is like the plague, and is therefore to be avoided.

Posted by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (Member # 59) on :

Eric James Stone, you are SO helpful!

Posted by MCameron (Member # 2391) on :

(Oh, that was too funny EJS)

Dan Simmons drove me crazy with his similes. Not only did he use a lot of them, but he did them in a really annoying manner. I think an example would be easier than trying to explain:

quote:
His sweat leaves tiny trails of red mud, like blood from some holy stigmata, on his brow and cheeks.

It's that word "some" that drives me crazy. He uses it in nearly every simile that he writes. I've gotten to the point where I call it a "simmonsle.

[EDIT: The quoted passage is from Endymion, the first paragraph of chapter 13.]

--Mel

[This message has been edited by MCameron (edited August 26, 2005).]

Posted by dee_boncci (Member # 2733) on :

I rarely use metaphor in writing. I can't recall a single one while I'm sitting here. But I like to think in terms of them.

Similies I do use, and like anything else, they can be overdone. But I don't use them when I think.

Wierd, it's kind of like I use similies when I write to soften the metaphors I think of.

Posted by Spaceman (Member # 9240) on :

I think the only time I've used simile and metaphor was while writing the speech of a charater from the U.S. south in dialect.

Posted by Survivor (Member # 213) on :

All English language writers use both, they're a standard part of our language. I use a few in my previous post.

Posted by Spaceman (Member # 9240) on :

Let me reword, the only time I've gone out of my way to use simile and metaphor was....(refer back to my last post).

Posted by dpatridge (Member # 2208) on :

My stories themselves are a metaphor, and I wouldn't exactly want to try nesting metaphors too much, now would I? That said, I do nest some metaphors, sparingly, and it's usually through the speech of a character and not directly in the prose.

As for simile, I try not to use it quite deliberately. If I notice one, I remove it, if I don't notice it, it gets to stay. I know that probably sounds kinda screwed up, but that's how I do it.

Posted by Brinestone (Member # 747) on :

Tad Williams is a good example of an author who can get carried away with similies and metaphors. I love a good simile or metaphor, but they were very distracting in his writing for me, especially because many of them weren't organic or even logical.

Like, "Her eyes flashed like a supernova." (No, he didn't actually write this one.) It's almost there, but my mind is too literal for it to work.

Posted by BuffySquirrel (Member # 2780) on :

I think similes and metaphors have their place even in speculative fiction.

I sometimes use similes in my first person alt hist novels, but I try to make sure the protag is making comparisons to something with which he's familiar. He doesn't use metaphors , which doesn't stop ME using them, although they have to be subtle.

What struck me in a novella called Breathmoss that I read some time ago was that twice the author refers to some action as being like what a detective would do. Except that the world in which the novella was set didn't seem to have any detectives. This was borne out when there was a murder, and no detectives appeared to investigate it. That incongruity really jarred on me, yet the novella has appeared in Best Of collections and won awards...so what do I know???

Posted by Doc Brown (Member # 1118) on :

Christine said:

quote:
Similies are like cayenne pepper...a little goes a long way.

Christine, surely you can't be serious!

How can you say similies are like cayenne pepper without also saying metaphors are sacks of manure?

Varishta: I was drawn to this topic by a peculiar coincidence. At this moment I lounge here at Hatrack River, sipping a martini. I made it myself so it's perfect, not too much vermouth at all. The particulars: stirred, not shaken; gin, not vodka; onion, not olive.

I never drink on days when I write. Today I thought about writing, but I did not write.

So here's to my writing friends at Hatrack River. May your words be summer wind, blowing like a lover's whisper into your reader's heart.

Cheers!

Posted by EricJamesStone (Member # 1681) on :

I don't drink alcohol, so the particulars of various drinks generally mean little to me. However, I recall reading many years ago a list of suggestion about the proper ratio of gin and vermouth to make a martini. The final few suggestions were:

Pour vermouth into the glass, then pour it out. Add gin. Sufficient vermouth will have remained on the glass.
Open a bottle of vermouth near the glass. A few minutes later, pour the gin. Sufficient vermouth particles will have spread to the glass through the air.
Pour the gin. While drinking, think about vermouth.

If one takes the amount of vermouth in a martini as a metaphor for metaphor in a story, then these last suggestions have some merit, in my opinion.

Posted by Doc Brown (Member # 1118) on :

EricJamesStone,

Do you see that you and I said the same thing?

Or perhaps you enjoyed my little toast? It's impossible for a sober person to read that twaddle without gnawing off a foot. Isn't it?

Posted by Spaceman (Member # 9240) on :

Now you've got me thinking about vermouth and not a drop of gin in the house. Come to think of it, not a swizzle stick, either.