Hatrack River Writers Workshop: Dialog Formatting

This is topic Dialog Formatting in forum Open Discussions About Writing at Hatrack River Writers Workshop.

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Posted by GZ (Member # 1374) on :

Anybody read Cold Mountain? I started it last night for a discussion group, and was reasonably interested in the character’s internal monologue and remembrances despite the repeated mention of the window.

Then I get to this:

quote:

-- Why did you never have any? Inman said.
-- Just happened that way.
-- Well, Inman said. You’re mightly calm. …

What possible purpose is there fornot using correct dialog format? Aliens I could believe this for, presented in the right context. But this is a Civil War solder talking to a blind man with no eyes outside the military hospital. Gagh!

Am I missing something here?

[This message has been edited by GZ (edited March 08, 2004).]

Posted by Balthasar (Member # 5399) on :

As far as I know, the first person to use this method for dialogue was James Joyce in his A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. I don't know why he did it; I'm sure he had his reasons. But like writing in the present tense, using dashes to set off dialogue (with no tags) is the vogue thing to do. Cormac McCarthy does it in his novels--well, he does it in one of them.

Posted by Christine (Member # 1646) on :

Couldn't explain that one to you, but I'm thinking about stealing the idea for my scifi novel....I've been looking for something other than italics, boldface or "" to show that they're not exactly speaking.

Posted by Kickle (Member # 1934) on :

Thank you guys very much. My goal this winter has been to work on my sentence structure and at the same time I have been reading James Joyce.This leaves me with a question, bit off the thread but I'll ask anyway, does Joyce use other grammer that is different than what is exceptable today or am I just crazy?
Personally I find presenting conversation in this form very comfortable to read.

Posted by rjzeller (Member # 1906) on :

I wonder what is the best way to handle dialogue formatting when trying to show people "chatting" through a service like IM or the like. In one of my novels, I've used the following:

<rjzeller: I have tried everything but I still keep getting blocked when I attempt to contact her.>
<MarenJo: I haven't had any problems...>

And so forth. Does that work or is there something better. Since it's not SPOKEN dialogue, I figured something different. Thoughts?

Posted by Christine (Member # 1646) on :

quote:
<rjzeller: I have tried everything but I still keep getting blocked when I attempt to contact her.>
<MarenJo: I haven't had any problems...>

I think the tagging works, but there is a problem....the conversation would go more
like this:

<rjzeller: I get blocked when I IM her>
<MarenJo: no prob here>

no periods, no punctuation, anacronyms all over the place...actually this probably sisn't right either....but there are no extraneous words...here are just a few I know that would be in a conversation on-line:

lol: laugh out loud
e1: everyone
IM: instant messenger
ISP: internet service provider

just to name a few...I bet there are web pages that can show you all sorts of these...basic rule is, as little as you can type and still get the message across. I read a short story at boot camp this summer that did an incredible job with this...I can't remember what she used for punctuation though, I think the chat logs were just indented, set apart, and of course used their screen names as opposed to real names...but yours works fine too. Probably what you should do it make it look like ti does on the computer screen.

Posted by Alias (Member # 1645) on :

What about using similar methods for non-verbal communication, and I mean mind-to-mind not sign language,

ex.
<Alien Soldier: You can hear me but, you can't>
Thomas wasn't sure what to think of the resounding voice in his head. He heard it, but he didn't ... it was his own voice.
<Alien Soldier: You wonder how you can hear me...>

<Alien2: We will go once more unto the breech.>
<Alien3: No, we will wait until they come to us.>

Would something like that work? My goal is to communicate this way and not use (",") or italics since the former would be confused with traditional dialogue and the latter is hard on the eyes for some people.

Posted by Christine (Member # 1646) on :

To me, that doesn't flow like dialogue...it is quite reminiscent of a chat room, or at best a play script. Even telepathy is a form of non-written language, which means it needs to stand out from the rest of the narration as language, not as more written words.

That's why I liked the idea of the double dash...I could read that like dialogue. It might throw me at first, but I'd get used to it. It includes the "he said" tag, which we are used to...although I would substitute it with "he sent" or "he signed" or something like that. (Because I think it would denote sign language well too..)

And I would never read, ant therefore never write, a novel in which all the dialogue was in italics. Eeeek! My eyes are burning! My eyes are burning!

Posted by Balthasar (Member # 5399) on :

Kickle -

It depends on which Joyce you're reading. If you're reading Portrait or The Dubliners, his writing is very accessible and grammatically correct. Of course, you have to take into account that he wrote almost one-hundred years ago and that he's Irish, so some issues of style might be a little different.

But if you're reading Ulysses or Finnegan's Wake--well, just stop . . . unless you want to write contemporary literary fiction. If that's the case, I can't help you. (And I'll be praying for you. )

Stick with the The Dubliners and Portrait, and you'll be reading and studying a master wordsmith.

[This message has been edited by Balthasar (edited March 09, 2004).]

Posted by Kickle (Member # 1934) on :

Balthasar, you may of saved me . I had read "Portrait" and " The Dead" and was headed for trouble. I will move on to a different writer.
As for dialogue I believe Joyce would do it like this:

Alien 2:
-We will go...
Alien 3:
- We all will go...

Posted by Balthasar (Member # 5399) on :

"The Dead" -- it should be required reading for every writer. A masterpiece, perfect in every way.

Posted by Jules (Member # 1658) on :

The '-- whatever, he said' style is the normal way of writing dialogue in some non-english languages, I believe. Certainly the French use it a lot more than we do, along with <<dialogue embedded in angle brackets>> in the text. Normal quotation marks are hardly ever seen in French text.

I think the Spanish might use dashes; it's been a while since I read anything in Spanish, so I can't be sure.

My memory ain't what it used to be, I think, although I can't quite remember what it was...

Posted by Alias (Member # 1645) on :

Christine,

So you suggest something like this...?

...The alien's jaw shook awkwardly as he mimmicked the laughter--you are silly, human--it said.

I didn't know what to think, "Uh, yeah ..." I said...

This seems awkward to me. I noticed Card has done it this way, <,> but in any event I would still tag the dialogue with "said," I believe.