Fahim's brother is getting married in 2 1/2 weeks. I've got the shalwaar already (rich aqua silk with tonnes of beadwork on it) and the jewellery (picking it up this Friday - silver jewellery with yellow topaz and aqua topaz stones) but have no idea what to do with my hair.
Here's the deal.
I have fairly wavy, thick thick hair down past my shoulders by a couple of inches. My hair is too heavy and slippery to put into a bun - I've NEVER been able to get it to do that and actually stay. I don't own either a hair dryer or a curling iron or anything to put curl into my hair. Huh. Unless I decide to tie it in rags or something, and then I'd have to buy some gel or hairspray or both, and that's doable.
I'm willing to cut my hair. Problem: I do it myself, and I'm only good to just above my shoulders. Any shorter and lack of evenness starts to show.
I have hair elastics - decent ones, but still. I have no barettes, and I only *just* thought of looking for some.
I can leave my hair loose and down, or I can tie it back somehow. I don't know what other options there are. Or, I don't know, shaving my head.
Yeah, I know, it's a pretty feeble problem. I get it. *sigh* I'm how old and I'm STILL this pathetic?
Okay, now I gotta give you a linky so you can see what the hair looks like. Let me see... Nope. Our internet connection is so slow and crappy right now that I can't get an upload working properly. I'll post it as soon as I can.
Posted by martha (Member # 141) on :
Bobby pins are magical. If no amount of elastics and hairspray will make your bun stay up, try massive amounts of bobby pins.
Or, do lots of tiny french twists in parallel lines starting in the front and going about four inches back, and clamp each one down with a little butterfly clip. I think this feat requires hairspray.
Whatever you plan to do, practice it and do your hair that way for three days before you need it -- that puts your hair in practice. No, I'm serious. Your hair will be more obedient if you're consistent in telling it what you expect of it.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Oh, hey, I know all about practice. There's no way I'd rely on getting something down in the final hours...
Hmm. Bobby pins. I wonder if those are available here? I'll put it on my list.
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
How about half up and half down?
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Um, how so?
Posted by Valentine014 (Member # 5981) on :
The key to doing a bun is making sure your hair is wet. Bobby pins will do the rest.
Are there salon's there? They don't sell dryers or curling irons? (Forgive me, I'm very ignorant about Sri Lanka)
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Oh, I'm sure dryers and curling irons are available. I just don't personally own any nor do I see a point in buying them when I'll use it maybe once.
Um, I think I'd have a problem doing a bun with wet hair. As it is, letting my hair hang loose, it takes two to twenty thousand hours to dry (remember the heat and humidity here). If I tie it back, it's never dry in under six or so hours. If I did a bun when it was wet, I think it would never dry. That doesn't strike me as comfortable.
Okay, thanks for that. Buns are officially out. Next!
And yes, there are salons, but I haven't gone to one because a. I had a very very difficult time finding hairdressers in Canada that could deal with my hair without butchering it (I think it's the combination of wavy with extremely thick that throws them) and in Sri Lanka, I'm not likely to have any better luck.
That, and there's no regulation in the hair industry, either with stylists or the chemicals they use. One woman (it was in the newspaper) ended up with full facial scars and blindness from a perm gone bad.
Gee, I dunno. That doesn't really appeal to me somehow.
Yeah, I'm a difficult patient.
So tell me to shove a scrunchie on and be done with it and I'll comply. Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
Try this. It's easy but looks fairly formal.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
dkw, that looks nice. I'm not sure if my hair is long enough - I think mine is two inches shorter than the model's - but I'll give it a try tomorrow. That type of hairstyle I think would stay put rather well.
Thanks for the ideas, y'all! I'm off to bed!
Posted by Nell Gwyn (Member # 8291) on :
Quid, having a bun with wet hair isn't really all that uncomfortable - that's what I tend to do if I don't have time to dry my hair before going to work. Yes, it's still wet when I take it down, but I can't really tell that it's wet while it's up - the only part that stays wet is whatever's inside the bun, i.e. not exposed to air. Wet hair isn't a prerequisite for a bun either, but it does tend to make it look a lot sleeker.
If your hair's really heavy (which I'm guessing it is), put it up in a ponytail with an elastic before doing the bun with bobby pins - that'll make it stay up a lot more securely.
I think what Imogen meant by half-up-half-down was pulling the top half of it (like from your ears up) back/up into a ponytail, bun, or some other style. At least, that's what *I* mean when I say half-up. Something sort of like this. I tried to find a better picture, but my Google-fu is weak today...most of what I found were the complicated variations involving curls, like this - very pretty, but probably more complicated than you're looking for.
The Gibson braid looks pretty too. I've never heard of that one - might have to try it sometime.
Posted by breyerchic04 (Member # 6423) on :
If you get pins could you do a french twist? Or some fake version of that where I put my hair in a pony tail, then fold it in half and pin it up my head (it actually looks nicer than it sounds).
My hair was pretty similar to yours until a year ago, lots and lots of wavy but fine hairs below my shoulders. I chopped it off, much easier. You could have Fahim do it for you (I've seen my dad try to cut my mom's hair right before they were going out, hilarious)
Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :
Nell, I wear my hair like what you're describing all the time. I always called it an "Alice in Wonderland" (or sometimes just an Alice), although I have no idea why since she loooked like she was wearing a headband in the Disney movie, which would have been my only exposure to the character at the time I started saying it.
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Okay, I see what you mean by half up-half down. I've seen some other variations on that that didnt' look all that good, but those two pics do. I'll think on that.
Nell - yes, my hair is really really heavy. Really. I've never actually done a bun before - or, at least, not one that was successful, so I actually have not a clue of how to do one. See, I'm telling you, I may be old, but I'm still pathetic.
I have no idea what a french twist is.
Hmm, have Fahim cut my hair? In retribution for me cutting his? Could be dangerous...
And, um, now I'm getting confused...
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
That's exactly it, Nell!
I do it a lot - usually I just pull the top back in a pony, but if I want it to look nice I twist it up a bit and put in a pretty clip or a flower or something.
Posted by Nell Gwyn (Member # 8291) on :
Here are bun-making instructions, complete with pictures! Rather than using a hair stick, it would probably work better to use bobby pins (if you can find them there). You'd do the same thing as the photos show, only you'd pin the coil to your head as you went along, keeping the pins close to your head rather than stabbing through the middle.
And after it's all up, since I bet any pins you'll find in Sri Lanka will be black (and your hair's red, right?) you could tie/wrap something around the bun to cover any visible pins - maybe you could make a fabric ribbon that would match your shalwaar? Or possibly fresh flowers?
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
We're going out shopping this Friday, so I'll be looking for anything/everything we need then. All the major stuff is bought, so we're now looking for the minor stuff for me, which includes hair whatevers.
Yep, my hair is red - although I need to find red hair color (the local store is out and has been for a while and I WILL NOT go brown or black. And I have to color before the wedding or risk atrocious roots!) And yes, the majority of people here have black or brown.
But if brown bobby pins exist, it'll be close enough.
Yeah, I wouldn't go with fresh flowers around the bun - I wouldn't be able to find any and it'd just be a pain. Ribbon, maybe.
breyerchic, is this what you meant by a French roll? If so, yeah, it looks nice. I've tried it before, but differently from the instructions they give, and my hair was shorter at the time, so who knows - maybe it could work now.
Nell, that's a great site you linked to. I like how they have instructions for almost everything. I'm going to go through that site and see what I think is possible and give a few a try. Thanks. Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
Just a warning: I have very thick hair, too, and after a couple of hours bobby pins have to be re-done because they start to fall out. Even the mega-giant hair pins for black girls. I've found that putting my hair into a hair elastic, then doing the bobby pin stuff to it, helps extend the length of time before my hair needs to be redone. Hair spray doesn't hurt, but really doesn't help much. Super-ultra-hold gel designed for black girls can help some.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
(I know those are probably not available there. Just warning you.)
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
Quid, I liked that french twist site you linked to. I am pretty pathetic when it comes to hairstyles too--although I do use a blow dryer and curling iron. But anything up or clipped or whatever--I just can't seem to make it happen. But I think I might be able to actually do that style!
And even if you end up going with your hair down, I'm sure you'll look just gaw-jus. Will you post pix of you in your finery?
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
quote:And even if you end up going with your hair down, I'm sure you'll look just gaw-jus. Will you post pix of you in your finery?
Aw, you're trying to make me blush, aren't'cha? :blush:
Sure, I'll post a pic of my finery. I'm getting my photo gallery working this morning - all those pictures I tried uploading yesterday worked. Like 80 times each. So now I'm weeding through the dupes... When that's done, I'll post a link to the shalwaars and sharwanis... Posted by Nell Gwyn (Member # 8291) on :
Quid, not quite. A French twist is an updo. This one is close to what a French twist is. The only major difference with how it looks is that with a traditional French twist you don't get that loop at the top; it's more like this or this. It'll more than likely take more pins than a bun would, so I'd get a lot of them before you start testing different styles.
A more modern trend is to not tuck the ends under and leave them coming out of the top - that's how I had mine for my senior prom, with all the ends becurled and beglittered. (However, I didn't do that myself. The stylist used well over a hundred pins on it, as my hair is also thick and heavy, and at the time it was almost down to my waist.)
Going through all these hairstyle sites makes me wish I had a wedding to go to - fancy hairstyles are fun!
Posted by Nell Gwyn (Member # 8291) on :
quote:When that's done, I'll post a link to the shalwaars and sharwanis.
Ooh, please do! I'd love to see them. Posted by breyerchic04 (Member # 6423) on :
Mine looks the most like the third Nell linked to.
Posted by Nell Gwyn (Member # 8291) on :
I also found these instructions for what I guess would be an Extreme French Twist. I wasn't going to post it, but I'm too amused not to. Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
I have my photo album sorted out. Finally. Got those extra 1500 photos deleted. Finally. Haven't labelled the photos yet. Ooops.
You can see the shalwaars and sharwani and kurta here. I'm going to label those right now so you can see what I'm talking about.
And thanks for the links on the French twists. I see entirely what you're saying now, Nell and breyer. Thanks for clarifying. Posted by Mrs.M (Member # 2943) on :
I wouldn't go with a French twist or any formal or semi-formal updo. I would find an elaborate ribbon or clip and gather your hair in a loose ponytail at the nape of your neck. You can also leave the bottom half down.
Or something that looks like this Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Mrs. M, the linked one is the one I'm actually thinking of doing. I think I can manage it and I think it'll stay in place.
I have to see if I can find some kind of ribbon or barette or something. That's going to be the big problem, potentially.
Why do you say not to bother with anything formal or semi-formal? Because I'm hopeless? I also have a hard time seeing something like that being overly flattering on me, if I think about it. Hmm. Good point.
Posted by Mrs.M (Member # 2943) on :
quote:Why do you say not to bother with anything formal or semi-formal? Because I'm hopeless?
Oh my goodness, not at all!!! I just thought that a hairstyle like that would take away from the outfit. I'm also not a fan of them in general - I even wore my hair half up for my wedding. I think that hair worn back and down, rather than back and up, is almost universally flattering.
As to the ribbons, can you cut one from a bolt of silk (or an old dress, etc.) and just stitch the ends?
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Mrs. M, of course you have more tact than that! I'm just kidding around! I AM hopeless...
But you have a great point on detracting from the shalwaar kameez itself.
Ribbons I can get - there are shops around that sell plain ribbons. I can put something together, I think. Let me think about it...
I'll have to verify colors from the kameez, but I could do something like a half dozen different ribbons of varying colors, lengths, and widths, sewn together and then tied over where my elastic band keeps the hair in place after doing that roll thingie.
But then I'll want to know how to curl the ribbon... Ideas? Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
The more I think about this, the more I think this might be the route to go. But as an added thought, given that clothing here is much more embellished than in the west, there's plain ribbon, ornate ribbon, ribbon with beading and/or embroidery... There's seriously a huge variety here.
This bears more research.
Now, if I had a glue gun and an empty barette... Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
One more thought I had was that if I found a ribbon with beading/emroidery that matched well enough, I could put a back on it and put elastic in it for a gathered thingie - much smaller than a scrunchie, not doubled over, but just a single covering over the elastic.
And this confirms, yet again, why I wanted to sew the thing myself. Then I'd have the leftover scraps of fabric to play with, rather than the seamstress having them! Grrr! Then I could make a perfectly matching handbag as well! Double Grrr! Grrr Grrr! Posted by MandyM (Member # 8375) on :
I am surprised no one mentioned a French braid. I think they are loveliest with thick hair and you could make it more formal by sticking pins with beads or flowers in them or even weave ribbons in the braid itself. You can do it on yourself if you practice a little and with enough hair spray, braids will stay in all day.
Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
Your shalwaar kameez is beautiful! (did I say that right? -- we just saw the kameez and not the shalwaar, right?)
Posted by Pinky (Member # 9161) on :
I would describe my hair the same way you described yours, and I'm quite often wearing a bun. Because of the slippery I normally take some Hairwax (or rather, Gel Wax) when the hair is still wet. Then I make a pony tail and use a lot of hair pins. You should fix the pins with hair spray, so they won't get loose after a while when the hair dries.
When I want to have curls, I wind the hair around folded paper towels, but I can tell, it's quite a lot of work with thick hair...
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
Also, one of those hair nets ( yes, the ones food service workers wear) wrapped around the bun only and secured with bobby pins blends into the bun and keeps it in place.
quid, what lovely work!
Posted by pH (Member # 1350) on :
Gel wax does wonders for coarser, thick, wavy hair.
I would know.
I used to use spray wax, but I like the gel wax much better.
-pH
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
My hair is in a gibson braid today. Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
French braids don't look good on me, unfortunately, but otherwise a good suggestion, Mandy.
Uprooted - you're right, you're seeing just the kameez, which is the tunic. The shalwaar is the pants, and the dupatta is the scarf or shawl. I didn't bother taking pictures of the pants because they're plain and unexciting. On the other hand, I'll (eventually) end up taking pictures of me wearing the whole outfit for each of them, and I'll (reluctantly) post those as well. Maybe.
Pinky, hair wax or gel wax doesn't exist here, and romanylass, those hair nets don't exist here either. Hair spray and gel do, and that's the best I'll ever be able to do here.
I'm pretty much settled on either a plain pony tail at the base of my neck or that hair roll thingie as mentioned here. I'll see if I can manage a Gibson braid, but I suspect my hair is a few inches too short to really work with it.
Imogen - is it difficult to do? How long is your hair?
It's the embellishments - ie barette or whatnot that I'm working on now.
Thanks, y'all! Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
So, I have fine, straight hair, that's almost to my waist. I have a formal event on Wednesday, that I haven't been sure how I was going to wear my hair. It's up in the pincurls from dkw's link right now, and I'm going to try out the Regency updo tonight and see how it looks and stays. The pincurls actually look really cute, which is kinda surprising, and good because I would need to wear them to work Wednesday and let them down at the end of the day to do the style and go to the event.
So thanks for starting this thread, quids! Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Um, you're welcome. Take pics, eh? I'd love to see how your hair turns out. Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
Quid, my hair is about 3-4 inches below my shoulders when wet and a good deal shorter when dry (curly curly hair. )
The braid was pretty easy to do actually, although I didn't tuck in the ends all neatly like the picture - I just pinned it up. The ends curled over (one of the benefits of curly hair) and so it looked intentional.
I used some bobby pins to anchor it (and a hair elastic for the initial pony tail) and it stayed up all day - but my hair will stay up pretty well, again due to the curliness factor.
I really liked it. Neat *and* stylish!
I should add: the three braids didn't hang down as long as in the picture, they pretty much just doubled back on themselves on the nape of my neck. But they still looked nice.
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
And for a hairstyle I don't recommend... Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
Um, no, I don't think I'll be going with that one. *shakes head* Yikes!
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
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See, I'm telling you, I may be old, but I'm still pathetic. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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So now I'm weeding through the dupes... When that's done, I'll post a link to the shalwaars and sharwanis... ![[Kiss]](graemlins/kiss.gif)