How do you feel about "re-gifting" - giving as a gift something that someone else gave to you as a gift, but which for some reason, you don't want?
To a certain extent, for me, it depends on the giver, the gift, and the recipient. Generally, I see gifts, especially holiday gifts, in two categories. There are gifts given because one knows the recipient very well and they want to give them something nice that they will appreciate. Then there are gifts one gives more as a token of the spirit of giving. For these, it's the act of giving and the message it sends, more than the actual gift itself, that are important.
For this second category, I have no problem with re-gifting. In fact, I've always thought that the perfect thing to do with a gift that misses the mark (so to speak) is to pass it on to someone who might actually appreciate the item itself.
Note, I'm not talking about hand-me-downs, or hideous things you just want to unload. I'm talking about the scented candle you got from a "secret-santa" at work in a scent you don't like, but you know you neighbor does like, and you've got that open-house at their house tomorrow night and you need a gift for them, etc.
Would you be offended if someone gave you something and somehow you found out it was a re-gift? Would you be offended if someone re-gifted something you gave them? Do you have a problem, yourself, with re-gifting?
My answer to all three, for me, is generally "no". I've gotten several re-gifts. Lucky for me I know a few people who hate candles, but they know I love them. While I'd be disappointed getting one from Chris, I have no problem getting one from a co-worker or "secret santa" or the neighbors, etc. If I found out something I gave to someone else was re-gifted, I wouldn't have a problem, though I would take note of that and make sure not to give something similar next year. And if someone, this year, gives me something I can't use or don't like, it will probably become a last minute gift for a friend who might like it, or maybe become a host/hostess gift for a dinner party I might be invited to next year. While I'd never want to hurt anyone's feelings, especially if they're so kind as to give me gifts in the first place, I don't really see anything wrong with helping things into the hands of people who might actually enjoy them.
What do you guys think?
Posted by quidscribis (Member # 5124) on :
I personally have no problem with either regifting or being the recipient of regifting for precisely the same reasons you gave. Posted by Uprooted (Member # 8353) on :
Ditto!
Posted by Kama (Member # 3022) on :
quote:While I'd be disappointed getting one from Chris
But he knows you love candles! Posted by El JT de Spang (Member # 7742) on :
I'd keep regifting between close friends.
Neither me nor my friends care about secondhand gifts; it's the thought that counts. But for relatives and immediate family (and significant others) I think it's a no-no.
Posted by KarlEd (Member # 571) on :
quote:Originally posted by El JT de Spang: I'd keep regifting between close friends.
Neither me nor my friends care about secondhand gifts; it's the thought that counts. But for relatives and immediate family (and significant others) I think it's a no-no.
Certainly, if I know someone really doesn't care, I'll re-gift, but I don't feel the need to declare a re-gift as such. That is, if I get the scented candle in a scent I don't like, I might use it as a host gift at the next party I go to and I don't think either the original giver or the ultimate recipient need to know it's a re-gift, precisely because it's the thought that counts.
But, yeah, I'd never give my brother something my sister gave me, etc. Too much chance for offending people.
Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
For his Bar Mitzvah, my son received three identical boxed sets of books. They were very nice, and an absolutely appropriate Bar Mitzvah gift. But he didn't need three identical sets. Two were re-gifted to other Bar Mitzvah boys.
I don't see anything wrong with that.
Posted by Shan (Member # 4550) on :
It's a fine hobbit tradition, this "mathom"ing of gifts.
*smiles*
Posted by romanylass (Member # 6306) on :
I both re-gift and am happy to recieve such. IMO if you keep it in the original packaging it's not "second hand". I think it's plain silly to keep something you'll never use on a shelf when someone else would apprecciate it.
Posted by ketchupqueen (Member # 6877) on :
I pretty much agree with everyone. Posted by Goody Scrivener (Member # 6742) on :
I regift all the time. And I would only be upset about receiving a regfited item if the person who gave it to me should have known that the item in question was blatantly inappropriate for me because that would show me that they gave me the item primarily to get it out of their own home. My sister is notoriously guilty of this - and has repeatedly been caught regifting items to one family member that she received from another family member. My brother is tempted to start regifting her regifts right back to her LOL.
Posted by Shigosei (Member # 3831) on :
I'm fine with getting a re-gift. In fact, I'd even be perfectly happy if people bought me books from a used bookstore. Hey, if you can give me three used books instead of one new one, I'm happy.
I would also be fine with people giving away gifts I had given them, assuming they weren't of sentimental value. If I give you something I made myself, I would prefer you keep it. Or give it back to me.
Posted by Synesthesia (Member # 4774) on :
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