This is topic Wedding Planning Roller Coaster in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.


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Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
I’ve been making calls about wedding stuff, so that if there’s anything Bob and I need to do together we can do it when he’s here the week before KamaCon. (Since the next time he’ll be here we’ll be well under the 6 month mark, and it will be a holiday, we might need to have things booked before then.) Early today I had a wonderful moment – I booked the chocolate fountain for the reception, and it was about half the price that I had budgeted for it and from a town only 60 miles away, so we can pick it up and not have to pay shipping. WooHoo! I mention this good news first so the rest of my post won’t seem so much like whining. [Wink]

Before I went to grad school I worked as a caterer for a restaurant in the town where we're having the wedding. It was a nice restaurant – white tablecloths, fresh flowers on the tables, a herb garden and small greenhouse attached. Yummy and interesting food. And since I enjoyed working there, and really like the owner, we decided to have them cater the reception.

However, the owner sold the restaurant last May. He told me the new owners were still planning on doing catering, and were going to be keeping the menu pretty much the same, etc. So today I talked to the new owner. Yes, they were still going to be doing catering, but they were changing the menu some and the prices would be going up a little. Not a problem – the prices hadn’t changed since I worked there six years ago, they were probably overdue. She said that for a wedding our size, she recommended a two-meat buffet. I said fine, tell me about that. “Well, you get your choice of two meats – baked ham, roast beef, roast turkey, or roast pork . . .” I said “we can’t have any pork.” She said, “Then I recommend you choose the baked ham, it’s the most popular.” I said, “Ham is pork.” She said, “Oh no, they’re two different choices.”

I began to worry at this point.

Then she began to discuss side dishes. Now remember, I had already told her this was a formal evening dinner. She suggested potato salad and green bean casserole. I didn’t get too excited about that, so she suggested baked beans and pasta salad. I asked about a few of the side dishes I remembered from when I worked there. No, they weren’t doing those any more. Then she started to tell me all about how they’re trying to change the image of the restaurant so it’s not just a place that people go for special occasions but the kind of place you’d just stop in for dinner during the week. And I’m thinking, “Great, but we’re talking about a special occasion here so why are you telling me this?”

After we hung up I called and set up appointments to talk to the two other formal caterers in town. The one we’ll probably choose is a few dollars per plate more expensive, but at least they know the difference between a formal dinner and an afternoon picnic. [Frown] And hey, since I got the chocolate fountain for half what I planned, we won’t even go over budget. [Smile]

I don’t think I’m going to do any more wedding stuff for a few weeks, though. I’m afraid I’m turning into Bridal Show Barbie or Bridezilla or something. [Angst]
 
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
 
Ooh... what on earth is a chocolate fountain? It sounds curiously marvelous!

I really think you should have a roller coaster at your wedding too. [Smile]

*hugs* Best of luck, and believe me, I've met Bridezilla (having worked as a florist for 3 years) and you will never be her.
 
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
 
"the next time he’ll be here we’ll be well under the 6 month mark,"

Holy Bajoley!!!
 
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
 
The whole planning stuff does tend to take over doesn't it?

Tony and I mantained that we weren't going to get obsessed until after my exams (mid November) - the wedding is in January. So far we are doing... ok.

We have the caterer. Top priority. Not that I'm obsessed with food or anything. [Big Grin]
We almost have a priest.

We had a venue, but then the guest list blew out from 100 to 150... mild panic ensued. We now have a new, and better venue. And we're the first people ever to get married there... trend setters.

The dress, flowers, shoes etc... yet to be arranged.

All in all Dana, you sound way more organised than me. And not bridezilla-ish at all.

(You know you've crossed the line when you sack a bridesmaid because she falls pregnant. True story.)
 
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
 
She hasn't even mentioned how irritating the photographer is.
 
Posted by Elizabeth (Member # 5218) on :
 
Well, not that you know of, Mack. ha ha!
 
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
 
Yeah, you should see what she says about you on the secret forum.
 
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
 
quote:
when you sack a bridesmaid because she falls pregnant
[Eek!] I am familiar with the Aussie slang, but that just paints a picture . . .
 
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
 
Sack means something else hu - ohhhh *look of dawning comprehension*

[Laugh] That's an unintentionally quite funny mental picture. Or disturbing.

Is fire better?
 
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
 
Dana,

Um...thanks for getting rid of a caterer who thinks ham isn't pork. Sheesh!

I suppose this means that the Chinette plates are out.

[Big Grin]
 
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
 
It was actually the combination of "sack" (which Americans use also) and "falls pregnant" (which we do not). Sort of implied the fall had a cause-and-effect . . .

And no, "fired" would NOT be better. [Angst]
 
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
 
Oh, ok.

[Confused]

I think I'll just resign myself to never quite understanding the different nuances of slang. Probably more amusing that way anyway.

Back on track.. I completely agree with the not going with the "Ham isn't Pork" woman. And she runs a restaurant?

Edit: I can never spell restaurant. Never.

[ July 29, 2004, 11:06 PM: Message edited by: imogen ]
 
Posted by rivka (Member # 4859) on :
 
My mom was once startled wide-awake late at night by a slang mis-match. She was asked by her host, a family friend -- married, and her dad's age, and British -- "So, shall I knock you up in the morning?"
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
Chocolate Fountain
 
Posted by TMedina (Member # 6649) on :
 
So much for fighting over the bouquet. [Big Grin]

-Trevor

Edit: For spelling.

[ July 29, 2004, 11:06 PM: Message edited by: TMedina ]
 
Posted by imogen (Member # 5485) on :
 
*yum*

Those pictures are making me seriously crave chocolate.
 
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
 
I was pregnant for my best friend's wedding.

She was a little worried when she found out....but it all worked out. Fortunately we had great people who did the bridesmaids dresses', they ordered extra material from the manufacturer of the dress, so they could wait until the week before the wedding, measure my tummy, and fashion a panel of extra material. Then they ripped the seams out of the skirt and added in the panel so there was just enough room for me and Natalie to be in the wedding. [Big Grin] I insisted all pics of me be made from the waist up, however.
 
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
 
I'll bet planning this wedding is really exciting for you, dkw. Shoot - the planning might be more fun than the wedding itself! [Big Grin]

Since you are such a whiz in the kitchen and a former caterer, I can see how you would be appalled with that lady.

*raises glass* heres to hoping everything goes smoothly for you in the rest of the your planning. You have lots of time -- give it a rest for a bit, kick back and relax! You're only going to be single for a bit longer!

Farmgirl
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
Wedding planning is fun, but then I like to plan parties. I wouldn’t mind at all if one of my bridesmaids were pregnant (well, maybe the 14 year old!). They’re a wide range of shapes and sizes already, and the dresses are fairly high-waisted, so they wouldn’t even be that hard to alter. Unless she had bad morning sickness and threw up during the ceremony. That might be a little off-putting.

I think I’m more upset about the change in the catering at that restaurant because of my own nostalgic memories than about having to change my wedding plans. When I worked there I was the one who did what the boss called “the fancy-schmancy sh--.” Choux pastry swans and stuffed cherry tomatoes, carved fruit and large platters decorated with a jungle of herbs and edible flowers – once we were asked to give a luncheon talk on cooking with edible flowers at the University horticulture gardens and I spent an entire week experimenting and developing flower recipes. So I’m sad to see the new owners going the baked beans and potato salad route. Not that there’s anything wrong with baked beans and potato salad type catering – but the grocery store deli does it quite well, and nobody else in town was doing the kinds of things we were. (Except one hotel and the University caterers, but they only do in-house.) Just a little bit of my past obliterated. [Frown] Hmmm. Maybe I’ll bring choux pastry to KamaCon.
 
Posted by Dagonee (Member # 5818) on :
 
Enjoy it. No matter how frustrated or harried you get, just remember that you're planning a party, and everyone will have fun!

Dagonee
 
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
 
<grumble>

I make chocolate covered strawberries for every family party. It's tradition. And what does she do? She gets a stupid chocolate fountian instead. Hrumph.

</grumble>

It does look kinda yummy, though...

[Big Grin]
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
You are helping me make the boquets and flower arrangements. You won't have time to dip 1000 strawberries.

[ July 30, 2004, 10:42 AM: Message edited by: dkw ]
 
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
 
Just set out a bowl of strawberries -- we will dunk them in the chocolate fountain ourselves, and then you will both be happy!

FG
 
Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
 
I am? You didn't tell me this. We're making the bouquets and flower arrangements? Are we stealing Annie first? Hobbes won't like that.
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
I'm concentrating our labor where we get the best value. We'll save about $2000 by doing the flowers ourselves.

I'm also sorting the bridal party by aesthetic ability. You and Petra are on flower detail. Patty's on "driving around to pick up stuff" detail. Everyone else is somewhere in between.
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
dkw are you ordering the flowers from a local florist or ordering online?

We found a really good wholesale place for Gwen's wedding. The flowers, which were pretty delicate irises were in very good shape after shipping.

We did large sheafs of Irises of varying colors for boquets for 4 bridesmaids and the bride and iris buttioneres and corsages for 12 assorted VIPsfor $100, including the ferns and the baby's breath. And we had lots of ferns and baby's breath left over.

We also used the boquets as decorations at the reception, since we did the long sheaves with the stems, we just put them in water and sat them on the cake table and they were beautiful.

AJ

http://www.onlinewholesaleflowers.com/Thunbnailcatalog2.html

(Is willing to help out with flowers since I've now done it once!)

AJ

[ July 30, 2004, 11:34 AM: Message edited by: BannaOj ]
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
freshroses.com?
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
There was another place with good prices that we were looking at but I can't seem to find them now with google. I can vouch for the place above though! Good quality and they were the most inexpensive.

AJ
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
Their box quantity discounts can't be beat, if you can find flowers you like in them.
http://www.onlinewholesaleflowers.com/Discounts.html

We bought I think 6 bunches of Irises 3 white 2 purple and 1 yellow. 2 bunches of ferns and 2 of baby's breath. These boquets were pretty substantial, Each bridesmaid had I think 9 irises and the bride had like 20.

Plus the rest that we used for buttioniers. Of all those flowers I'd say there were maybe 3 or 4 irises that we rejected as not usable because they were just a smidgen bedraggled.

AJ
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
you might be interested in their wedding in a box packages too.
http://www.onlinewholesaleflowers.com/weddinginabox.html

AJ
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
Judging from the "boxed" packages the two places are fairly similar in price, however the place I reccommended has more flexibilitly with their packages IMO. Also it depends on exactly what flowers you want too. I think there is a little more variety overall at the online wholesale flowers place. I couldn't have gotten irises from your place.

AJ
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
The advantage of freshroses.com is that their flowers are grown in CA, not in South America. Slightly less time from cutting to delivery, and slightly better treatment of farm workers.
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
This is true. I don't know for sure where the flowers are grown. It appears they get them from many sources depending on the time of year.

<grin> We didn't think about that at the time...

AJ
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
Pesky social consciousness. [Big Grin]
 
Posted by BannaOj (Member # 3206) on :
 
I'm glad you have it!
[Wink]
AJ
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
Found another caterer – leaning more towards the “formal dinner” end of things but not as pricey as the restaurant I mentioned earlier. Bob and I are going to meet with her next week.

And the fabric for my veil came while I was out of town! I had an awful time trying to find it wide enough for what I wanted to do, until I thought to check theatre supply companies. Four yards of 108” wide off-white chiffon. [Smile]
 
Posted by celia60 (Member # 2039) on :
 
i had to can a bridesmaid due to pregnancy as well. she was so upset when i told her, but july in alabama is no place for a usually 90lb girl who happens to be at the end of 7 months. at about 5.5 months she started agreeing with my decision.

i don't intend to plan anything on that scale ever again. ugh.
 
Posted by dkw (Member # 3264) on :
 
I’m actually really enjoying this. I like to plan parties, and I don’t very often get to plan one on this scale. Plus, Bob and I are planning it together, which is fun, and some of the choices we’re making are good lead-ins to deeper discussions about what’s important to us and what’s not, both in the wedding and in our lives. So far it’s been a blast. (Of course, it’s still almost eight months away. Plenty of time for panic and frazzledness to take over. [Wink] )
 


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