This summer, my best friend and I (and another girlfriend, it looks like) are going to Mexico. We've been saving our money and we want to have a really great adventure - not just some lame American beach resort cop-out. We're planning on flying into Mexico City, and then taking local buses everywhere and going to Veracruz, Tabasco, Chiapas and Oaxaca.
We don't want to lay on the beach and buy lame souvenirs; we want to meet local people (Vanessa is a Spanish major and I speak it well enough to get around), see ancient architecture, and I want to do research on a thesis paper I'll be writing on the use of the tree in Mexican folk art. We're being really smart - we've got the Lonely Planet guide and a few connections that can get us at least from the airport to the bus station. We've both been before and know the health precautions, and we're not going to be visiting any clubs of ill repute or hitting the party scene. Our moms have known about this since we've been planning it.
Here's where the related phenomenon of freaking out comes in. Both my grandmother and my dad are dead-set against us going. My grandma wrote me a nice letter that said "Frankly, the ideas of you two girls going to Mexico scares the hell out of me. It's not safe, even the police are corrupt. Why don't you visit New Mexico or Arizona or San Diego - these places have hispanic populations and you can enjoy the language and the culture there." My dad says he wants me to ask my friend to cancel arrangements she's made to help at a girls camp so we can go 2 weeks earlier and stay for a week and a half rather than a month - this so my marine brother can come with us.
How do I address this? We've really put a lot of precaution into our planning. We're going to be spending the vast majority of our time in small towns and rural areas, places we've been before, which are a lot safer than even American cities. We're smart girls, and we're both 23 years old. I don't want to upset my family, but I also don't want to spend my hard-earned money on a lame replacement vacation just so they won't worry.
What would you do?
Posted by TomDavidson (Member # 124) on :
You could always come to KamaCon instead. Posted by Frisco (Member # 3765) on :
They'll get over it once you're back.
My Mom totally approves of all my adventures, provided that I don't tell her about them until I return alive.
Posted by Snarky (Member # 4406) on :
quote:Why don't you visit New Mexico or Arizona or San Diego - these places have hispanic populations and you can enjoy the language and the culture there.
Why go to France when you've got Quebec in your back yard?
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
It's exasperating - but they're honestly worried about it. Is it really that risky of us?
quote:You could always come to KamaCon instead.
Oh hey - you're right! I hear they have hispanic populations in Chicago too! I can enjoy the language and culture in one of the safest urban settings around
[ May 11, 2004, 04:34 PM: Message edited by: Annie ]
Posted by celia60 (Member # 2039) on :
You're an adult.
You go, and you send them horribly letters about getting mugged on the bus, and arrested and detained for no conceivable reason.
And then you come home having had a wonderful time where none of those things happened.
Everyone gets what they expected out of it. Win win.
Posted by Richard Berg (Member # 133) on :
You're an adult. Even the worm is probably sterile.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
You're an adult. You hug them, thank them for the concern, have a great time, and then thank them for paying the hospital bills when you get hit by a truck.
Posted by Javert (Member # 3076) on :
I agree with Katharina. While they can be mad at you, your family really can't stop you from going.
The only possible bad thing is that, and I hate to be the one to say this, should something bad actually happen you'll have to deal with mad family who is also saying "I told you so". I guess it's really up to you.
But anyway, I say go and have fun! Posted by Snarky (Member # 4406) on :
Wait—haven't you gone to Mexico before? If so, why are they still freaking out?
Posted by Noemon (Member # 1115) on :
Here's what you do: You tell your parents that instead of going on vacation to Mexico, you're just spending the night at her house for a month. Then, have her tell her parents that she's spending the night at *your* house for a month. They'll be none the wiser.
Seriously, thank them for their concern, and go. You've done the research, and undoubtedly have a much better idea of what the risks are than they do. They're coming from a good place, but they've got to let you live your life.
Posted by Richard Berg (Member # 133) on :
Before anyone takes the jokes too seriously, a quick reminder that they will never treat you like an adult if your response is to deceive them Posted by Kama (Member # 3022) on :
Some people are scared I'm coming to the US and spending time with internet people.
Posted by Annie (Member # 295) on :
I think last time, they didn't freak out because I was in groups that included menfolk. Apparently, menfolk send out a warning beacon that deters pickpockets and Zapotista rebels. Female folk, however, are merciless victims-to-be in sundresses.
ok.. that was a little snarky. They're worried that 2 girls traveling alone won't be safe. And they have reason to be. But we do have a little more savoir faire than the average pair of co-eds.
Posted by katharina (Member # 827) on :
I apologize for the stereotypes, but it's a macho, sexist country. Go anyway, but there's no invisible force field of protection around you.
Don't leave your companion.
Kama: They've been reading the Out Of Context thread, haven't they.
[ May 11, 2004, 05:08 PM: Message edited by: katharina ]
Posted by Snarky (Member # 4406) on :
Little Snarky? Posted by MyrddinFyre (Member # 2576) on :
No one's actually forbade you to go. So just go. And when you get back, your grandmother and dad will feel a lot better about it... and, possibly, future trips.
*jealous beyond belief*
Posted by Hobbes (Member # 433) on :
I think you just need to make sure they know that you're taking their warning seriously and you've put a lot of thought into it. After that, just enjoy yourself and take some pictures for me!
quote:Crime in Mexico continues at high levels, and it is often violent, especially in Mexico City , Tijuana , Ciudad Juarez and Nuevo Laredo . Other metropolitan areas have lower, but still serious, levels of crime. Low apprehension and conviction rates of criminals contribute to the high crime rate. Travelers should leave valuables and irreplaceable items in a safe place, or not bring them...
Kidnapping, including the kidnapping of non-Mexicans, continues at alarming rates. So-called "express" kidnappings, an attempt to get quick cash in exchange for the release of an individual, have occurred in almost all the large cities in Mexico and appear to target not only the wealthy, but also middle class persons. U.S. businesses with offices in Mexico or concerned U.S. citizens may contact the U.S. Embassy or any U.S. consulate to discuss precautions that they should take. Four Americans were kidnapped in separate incidents in Nuevo Laredo during the Spring and Summer of 2002...
Tourists should not hike alone in backcountry areas, nor walk alone on lightly frequented beaches, ruins or trails. Local authorities have reported an increase in armed robberies in the popular tourist destination of northern Sinaloa, especially near the fishing resorts. Caution should be exercised when visiting this area...
[ May 11, 2004, 05:45 PM: Message edited by: Suneun ]
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
¿Oaxaca?
¡Oaxaca!
Posted by Risuena (Member # 2924) on :
I'll agree with everyone else saying that you're an adult. I'd also say that the violence in Mexico is greatly exaggerated.
Do you think your family would be happier if you had the names and contact information for some people in the areas you're going to visit? I have some contacts that I could share with you if you like.
Also, make sure you have the US Embassy's and appropriate consulates' emergency numbers and give them to your family. It's not a lot but it might be enough for your family.
Posted by UofUlawguy (Member # 5492) on :
I (a rather large and imposing male) would not be comfortable traveling in Mexico or Central America unless I was part of a larger group (larger than just me and a companion or two). And I lived there for twenty months!
Posted by Risuena (Member # 2924) on :
:shrug: I went to Mexico by myself and most people were very welcoming. Of course, I wouldn't go to Mexico City by myself, but I think most areas in Mexico that aren't super cosmopolitan or over-infested with tourists (the border, Cancun and other popular resort areas) are fine. Although at the same time you don't want to go too far off the beaten path, particularly in Oaxaca or Chiapas where there's been some unrest in the indigenous communities.
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