Hatrack River Forum: lesson learned

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Posted by kidyanna (Member # 6148) on :

Have you ever seemed to notice how hard it is to take your own advice?
Or sometimes to even learn from your own mistakes?
some people are blessed with only one or the other of these "wonderful traits"...some are lucky enough to have neither.
i on the other hand am one of those bleesed souls who has both...i never can seem to figure out what to do with my life...sigh...
i guess this is steming from the fact that no matter what there is this friend of mine that no matter how angry i get or how much he hurts me i simply cannot live without him... ge's one of those people who i have to know their opinion on almost everything....did i also mention he's my ex? I can only wait for life to get more complicated after high school....

Posted by Raia (Member # 4700) on :

(((((kidyanna)))))

You know my take on the situation. All I can say is try to forget him, there will be others. I promise you that. [Kiss]

Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :

I am of the firm opinion that, unless you marry your high-school sweetheart, romances in high school just don't count.

You seriously will change so much in the next few years, and care about things that you haven't even thought of yet, and find people who are so much more awesome as friends and advisors, that whatever this hold this adolescent svengali has over you now will be completely obliterated from memory.

Another point. The person you choose to "check everything with" should be someone you truly trust and who obviously has your best interests at heart. It sounds like this guy is not that person.

Posted by blacwolve (Member # 2972) on :

((((kidyanna))))

Listen to Bob, he's smart. And if it's who I think iot is all I can say is. [Group Hug]

Posted by pooka (Member # 5003) on :

Just wait 15 or 16 years. I guarantee he will look downright pathetic by then.

Posted by Starla* (Member # 5835) on :

I'm sorry. ((((((kidyanna)))))

I have to agree with most and say that though it may hurt a lot now, in a year, it won't. In two, you won't care, and in five, you won't be able to believe you dated him. And in 10, you won't remember.

I know how you feel. [Group Hug]

I've been there, Pookas probably been there, and I'm sure Bob has. It'll be okay. [Smile]

[ January 31, 2004, 01:20 AM: Message edited by: Starla* ]

Posted by kidyanna (Member # 6148) on :

Thanks you guys.All of you. [Hat]

Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :

I can only echo others. You WILL get past this. Of course, that doesn't diminish what you feel right now.

But I am a firm believer that pain and hurt are all a part of building character. I would not be the same person I am today if my father had not abandoned us when I was a baby. And, since I normally quite like who I am, I can accept that the pain I went through was necessary.

Thornton Wilder in his play "The Angel that Troubled the Waters" wrote a statement that has been a mantra for me the last few years as I've tried to get a grip on who I am.

"Without your pain, where would your power be? It is your very remorse that makes your low voice tremble into the hearts of men. The very angels themselves cannot persuade the wretched and blundering children on earth as can one human being broken on the wheels of living. In Love’s service only the wounded soldiers can serve."

How can you develop compassion if you never hurt? It's hard, and it sucks when you go through it, but it makes you a better person in the end.

*hugs*