My friend Julee just accused me of being TOO Flirtatious. She says i have the tendency to lead girls on or give them the wrong idea.
i don't see it. even if it were true and i am super flirtatious, is there such a thing as overload? of TOO flirtatious?
so yea...im pondering over this for a moment.
Posted by Kama (Member # 3022) on :
But... but... I thought you meant it... I thought you wanted to marry me!
You broke my heart!
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Hey, if you stop short of billboards or sky-writing messages, I'm sure the ladies understand it's all in good fun.
Posted by Farmgirl (Member # 5567) on :
quote:i don't see it. even if it were true and i am super flirtatious, is there such a thing as overload? of TOO flirtatious?
I guess there must be. My teenage kids refuse to go anywhere with their dad because he embarrasses them so badly by flirting with every female waitress or store clerk they come across.
FG
Posted by mackillian (Member # 586) on :
You're entirely too flirtatious. *pat pat*
Seriously, if a guy flirts so much that he tends to lead girls on, no girl will really respond if you DO like them, because they wouldn't be sure and would assume that you are leading them on as well.
Posted by Belle (Member # 2314) on :
Depends on the circumstances and the people involved.
Flirting at a funeral - BAD
Flirting at a party, with friends around you - Probably OKAY
Flirting with a married woman who is very shy and quiet - BAD
Flirting with a single friend who has an outgoing personality and knows it's all in fun - OKAY
You just have to judge each situation and person differently. And exercise, you know - tact and sensitivity.
Posted by Storm Saxon (Member # 3101) on :
What if I flirt with this really hot girl I know on this one public forum I go to?
Posted by Ophelia (Member # 653) on :
That's a good question. See, I really don't think there's a problem with being flirtatious as long as the people around you know what's going on. But Jamie's right; it can lead to people you really are trying to hit on thinking you're just kidding.
Posted by Slash the Berzerker (Member # 556) on :
I disagree, Belle.
I flirt with shy and quiet married women all the time, and they LOVE it.
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
True.
We married wenches just figured it was good practice for the young men who came to wenchcon. We were off-limits, therefore safe. I think somebody used the words "Learning opportunity," but I don't remember who.
[ January 20, 2004, 03:53 PM: Message edited by: Olivet ]
Posted by Morbo (Member # 5309) on :
Surreal thought that flitted around in my mind late one night at Wenchcon: Mac's macking Mac?
[ January 20, 2004, 04:43 PM: Message edited by: Morbo ]
Posted by Primal Curve (Member # 3587) on :
Ben: The new attention whore?
I suppose we could use one.
Posted by Anthro (Member # 6087) on :
Huh. Half my conversations with a friend of mine sound horribly flirtatious, and she has a boyfriend. But it's dead fun.
EDIT: Spelling
[ January 20, 2004, 04:59 PM: Message edited by: Anthro ]
Posted by saxon75 (Member # 4589) on :
quote:I suppose we could use one.
Seriously. We've been seriously lacking ever since Ralphie quit hanging around so much.
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
LOL, Morbo, everything seems surreal with that kind of prolonged sleep-deprivation. Posted by Morbo (Member # 5309) on :
Last night I met a crazy drunk biker chick and I still couldn't get any action. Perhaps I'm not flirtatious enough?
Posted by xnera (Member # 187) on :
Gotta agree with mack on this one. Also, will add this from my personal experience: The first guy I kissed was a huge, huge flirt. Once I realized this, it made his attention to me seem less special and just ordinary. Women like to feel that they're special.
I do think flirting can be okay in some circumstances. I used to flirt with one of my friends all the time, but we both knew it didn't mean anything because we were both seeing others at the time. And I've sometimes gently flirted with sales clerks or random people I meet, because it's not likely that I'll be interacting with them much in the future. I'm much more cautious with flirting with friends or with people I see a lot, because I <i>am</i> concerned about leading them on or things becoming uncomfortable.
Posted by Ben (Member # 6117) on :
i STILL say i don't flirt too much. it's just in my nature how i behave. i'd like to think when i'm actually flirting with/hitting on a girl they would realize it. but then again i've had more then a few girls hav eto be like "OK, balls to the wall, where do we stand?" and what i thought to be obvious apparently isn't. but i still just chalk that up to them being unperceptive. so...yea.
Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
Maybe your friend Julie likes you. Maybe she's hinting at something.... Posted by Ben (Member # 6117) on :
she's an ex.
besides i actually realized i seem to clam up and act a bit more shy and quieter around those i truly dig...don't know why.
i'm a touchy feely person, but i shy away from making contact with them sometimes when i don't with others.
[ January 21, 2004, 01:09 AM: Message edited by: Ben ]
Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
quote:Last night I met a crazy drunk biker chick and I still couldn't get any action. Perhaps I'm not flirtatious enough?
Morbo...do you have a bike? It's sort of a prerequisite if you're going to hit on crazy drunk biker chicks.
And just a pointer: You DO NOT want to offer to ride on the back of HER bike! That's like getting a sex change operation or something.
Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
*wants to trade in car for this* Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
No. No crotch rockets. Sorry.
Get a sensible motorcycle with a big cushy seat for those long rides.
Then visit TX!
Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
I don't think I will ever visit Texas. The company I work for is based in Plano, but other than going there for business (or possibly to visit you someday Bob) I have no interest in that horribly hot state.
I'm sure it's nice and all, but I absolutely hate, abhor, and detest hot weather. Posted by Bob_Scopatz (Member # 1227) on :
Your motorcycle will change all that.
Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
I don't think so. I'm the kind of person that is comfortable in 25 degree weather on a breezy day with shorts, a t-shirt, and and flip-flop sandals. Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
Ben, let me get this straight. If you really dig a girl, you might actually touch/annoy her less?
That is whack, man. That is why women never know where they stand with you. The girls you really like probably figure that you just feel brotherly toward them.
Weird how things like this work. Back in HS I picked up weirdos and stalkers all the time. People I didn't know would call me or walk miles to my house. Or follow me around grunting and clacking their retainers. *shudder* I was a freakshow magnet. Noah, in his infinite wisdom (and admittedly superior understanding of the mind of hormonal teenaged boys ) said that was because I was a type of that more fellas would be attracted to, and the crazies were just bolder than the nice ones.
That is sooooo whack, but I guess I'll choose to believe it because it's comforting.
Anyway, IM me or something.
Posted by Jenny Gardener (Member # 903) on :
Livvy, that's because you're both hot and kind. Guys drool over you, but you're approachable. So they try to get within your aura. Now, if you were hot and mean, you wouldn't have so much of a problem.
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
Is that the voice of experience talking? Posted by Jenny Gardener (Member # 903) on :
You are sooooooo much nicer than I am!
Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
Well, I didn't add your swimsuit and pajamas to the auction list, now did I? Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
quote: Noah, in his infinite wisdom (and admittedly superior understanding of the mind of hormonal teenaged boys
Now now, you're going to have to stop all of that.
Girls have hormones too. What do you do if you're hit on constantly at college when you're already taken without being seen as mean? Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
I don't think you've met Noah. He's a special case.
Just be honest. Slip in something about your girlfriend in conversation, or just say, "You're nice and all, but I'm taken."
Posted by Nick (Member # 4311) on :
Well I haven't actually "met" anybody on any of the forums. Posted by Olivet (Member # 1104) on :
Oh I can see why the girls go nuts now. Posted by pH (Member # 1350) on :
Olivet, as a fellow freakshow magnet, I feel your pain.
And it doesn't help that I also refuse to speak to the ones I like. *le emo sigh* Even when they hang around the gate to the quad while my friends and I are out there getting some sun.
We were just talking about how we actually wished more guys acted the way we do sometimes when they found us attractive. You know, hang in the corner, lament, come up with weird plots to get our attention without seeming horribly desperate...so there might actually be some girls who appreciate Ben's whole.."I like you, go away!" thing.
-pH
[ January 21, 2004, 03:02 PM: Message edited by: pH ]
Posted by Javert Hugo (Member # 3980) on :
I think one of the most liberating days of my life was when I realized there's nothing to lose by telling someone he rocks your world.
Sadly, I came to this realization by losing some guy friends because I never said anything. They are going to hook up with someone eventually, and unless it's you, you'll lose them then. Just say it. Posted by pH (Member # 1350) on :
I won't! And you can't make me! Besides, I keep seeing him talking to girls.
*will send telepathic waves instead*
Posted by sarahdipity (Member # 3254) on :
I had a friend who flirted a lot. And like Mac claimed no one was ever sure if he liked them. I don't know that he dated while we were in college. Even if you did know he liked you the fact he really flirted with all those other girls was enough to put some people off. Sometimes it also matters how you flirt.
Posted by Jenny Gardener (Member # 903) on :
I'm addressing these posts in reverse order, Ben dear. Seems a Wench Perspective might do you good.
"besides i actually realized i seem to clam up and act a bit more shy and quieter around those i truly dig...don't know why."
I know why. You've been hurt before. If you've been burned, it's hard to get close to the flame.
"i'm a touchy feely person, but i shy away from making contact with them sometimes when i don't with others"
That's because there's a different dynamic with someone you consider "safe" and someone who could break your heart. How close will you let yourself get to someone who could potentially break your heart? However, and I am reading between the lines here, it seems that you are wondering if the risk might be worth it.
"i STILL say i don't flirt too much. it's just in my nature how i behave. i'd like to think when i'm actually flirting with/hitting on a girl they would realize it. but then again i've had more then a few girls hav eto be like "OK, balls to the wall, where do we stand?" and what i thought to be obvious apparently isn't. but i still just chalk that up to them being unperceptive. so...yea."
Okay, that's offensive. It's not obvious, because "flirting is in [your] nature." And if you aren't being honest with your special ladies, they have to be aggressive to find out where you stand. Perhaps it's time to spend some time being really honest with yourself about what you feel and what you are communicating about your feelings.
(You can tell me I'm full of crap now, if you like)
Posted by Ben (Member # 6117) on :
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Cry]](graemlins/cry.gif)
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Angst]](graemlins/angst.gif)