posted
Things didn't turn out like I wanted them to, but better than I expected. Stupid me didn't save the AIM conversation, but here it goes. This is what I told him:
quote: Through this person, I have known many new things. We share so many things in common like my most grandest
love of Japan and its arts. He enjoys my taste in music which really touched me because many people would prefer
to listen to other things. He enjoys designing as much as I do. He was the first man I met that understood my intrest in
HTML and its wonders. I have hated the fact that I was too blind to see my true feelings when I could have told him
during the times that I could see him every day. That person, is you Michael.
Things happened, and later, I wrote this to him:
quote:Now you realize why I was so thrilled when you said you'd go to prom with me and so disappointed when you said
you couldn't. Now you know why I was so intrested in going to homecoming with you. I am sorry for never looking my
best when we met. And I must really thank you for having taken things in a mature way and choosing to stay my friend
unlike others who prefer to not know of me again because they do not know how to handle the situation. I am sorry for
never being my true self to you because I lacked confidence. I am sorry I kept such a secret from a friend. I'm very
sorry for apologizing every freakin' second, but I just feel this way. Please continue to be there for me like you have
always have. I know I will survive, but I think it will take me some time to recover; therefore, all I can say is that I will be
waiting (beats me what I'll be waiting for, but it sounds poetic =P). I knew how you thought about me, I knew I had no
hopes with you, but I wanted you to know so badly. Please forgive me for jeopardizing our friendship, I completely
disregarded your feelings. I miss you so much and I thank you for not hurting me as much as Andrew.
Thank you for your support and understanding. Sweet dreams elf, V
Guess how that went. BTW, I call him elf because he reminds me of the Keebler elf, its an inside joke. What do you guys think? What did Ido wrong?
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
Honestly? You told him you liked him in a flowery third-person note.
But no, unless you did some things to be ashamed of when you two talked about this, you did not "totally disregard" his feelings. You told him how YOU feel, which shouldn't make you feel slightly guilty; there's no need for you to apologize to him for anything.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
I know what you mean Tom, and I think I felt that way too, but I just felt like I had let him down someway. *sigh* Sometimes, I just hate being me.
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
Uh, nothing wrong here. If he'd have liked you, the "flowery" thing would have been cute, I think. At least I would have liked it. And don't feel bad at all about telling him about your feelings. Hiding them would have been the wrong way to go. Don't get me wrong, I understand perfectly well what you mean by jeopardizing a friendship, but I think it would have started to be too much for you should you have kept it all for yourself.
A friend of mine had two boys chasing after her, and although their intentions were clear none of them had the courage to say it out loud. She wasn't interested but didn't feel like she was the one that should tell them, but in the end it all became too weird so she told them both. I don't think they really got it - but that's entirely THEIR problem - but she feels much better now, knowing that she did what she could to set things straight. Playing with "secret crushes" can be interesting if both parties are indeed interested, otherwise someone's just going to get hurt more than necessarily the longer things go on.
Posts: 4519 | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
I didn't think there was anything wrong with that. Sometimes it just has to be hit and miss, whether or not you talk to the right person.
Don't let it get you down, Alt. *hugs* And don't take this as a model for what all other attempts will be like!
Posts: 7877 | Registered: Feb 2003
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Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
... I sorry if I appear somehwat dense but I'm not entirely sure of what your saying, did you manage to start a relationship? So far the thread sounds like a negative, but I'm not sure, sorry for appearing somewhat blind in my post.
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If the friendship is worth preserving then something like this shouldn't be an obstacle. You shouldn't feel sorry for telling him how you feel and unless there's something else you're not telling us about you didn't disregard his feelings either.
I'm glad you guys could stay friends but don't feel bad because you told him how you felt. Relationships should be open and if you can't tell your friends how you feel then who can you tell?
Posts: 459 | Registered: Mar 2005
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posted
You did nothing wrong, sweetie. Sometimes even if you are a super-terrific person, with lots in common with the object of your desires, he just won't be interested.
You can't MAKE him dig you.
And you deserve someone who does. It is very crummy being head-over-heels for someone who is indifferent to you. And it is kind of crummy having someone that you are indifferent to go all head-over-heels for you. But it is beyond wonderful being head-over-heels for someone who feels the same way about you.
Hold out for that. Even if it takes a while, it is worth waiting for.
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![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
And don't feel bad at all about telling him about your feelings. Hiding them would have been the wrong way to go. Don't get me wrong, I understand perfectly well what you mean by jeopardizing a friendship, but I think it would have started to be too much for you should you have kept it all for yourself.![[Smile]](smile.gif)
*hugs* And don't take this as a model for what all other attempts will be like!
