Enderverse, and will contain slight spoilers regarding Enderverse, on the off-chance that someone hasn't picked up that series yet. ;D
I've wondered about something to do Petra for a long time, but I've never had anyone to ask. I know that (at least through Shadow of the Hegemon) she regards herself as "the one that broke" during the last "test" in Battle School. She seems to think that this is how Ender et al see her, too, and I was wondering if this might have been true or just Petra's mind piling guilt onto her.
I vaguely remember Ender saying something at one point about how it was his fault for relying too much on her. I think I've always assumed that Ender never lay any sort of blame on her, but do you think that any of the other Battle School kids who fought in the last test did?
Petra's guilt seemed to be a big part of her character, at least in the earlier part of the Shadow series, and that's just always been something I've wondered about. Is she the only one who's ever blamed herself? Thoughts? Ideas? Or did I pick something silly to read too deeply into?
Posted by BlueWizard (Member # 9389) on :
The others may or may not have blamed Petra in the moment, but, if the did, I think they soon got over it. They all felt that same intense exhausting pressure that Petra felt. They all felt themselves on the verge of collapse, and they all saw Ender relying on Petra far too much. So, yes, they may have felt a degree of blame directed at Petra, but in the moment, I think they felt a greater sense of fear that they would be next. Remember, Ender himself also collapsed on the job and was bedridden for a while.
So, while in the moment they may have felt both a degree of blame and fear, I think after the fact, they soon forgot it. Petra certainly proved herself over and over again before, during, and after the battle, and I think her friends saw her as being much more than that one terrible moment in time.
Too bad Petra couldn't feel the same about herself.
Steve/BlueWizard
Posted by DDDaysh (Member # 9499) on :
Not to mention that she was what, 13 or 14 at the time, maybe a couple of years older, but certainly not yet out of childhood. I think, no matter what the feelings at the moment, people soon realized she was at least as strong as anyone else in the world. I think however, that her "breaking" was best seen at the end of the series, when it took her so long to come home, and that it was the remembered fear of falling apart that drove her to it.